I frown at him. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
He smirks as he hauls the heavy timber over his shoulder. “You’ve been starring at that stump like it offended you for the past ten minutes.”
My eyes move from him to the machine in front of me and then to the untouched tree stump in the ground, my frown deepening when I realise that he’s right. I’ve been stood here with the stump grinder hovering over the stump, and I haven’t even turned the key to power the damn thing on.
Shit.
I run a hand down my face. “I’m fine.”
“Okay then. We’re gonna head to The Boot after our shift, you coming?”
The mere thought of alcohol has my stomach tying itself in knots, so I shake my head. “Nah. I’ve got shit to do at home tonight.”
Callen lifts his chin in acknowledgment and continues his earlier task. I turn back to the grinder and finally turn the key. The engine roars to life beneath my hands, the sound welcoming as it drowns out my earlier thoughts.
***
I lasted exactly an hour before I gave in to my ever-present thoughts of secret-filled eyes and dark curly hair.
I’ve accepted the fact that no matter what I try to do to keep my mind occupied, the moment I’m alone she’s there, at the forefront of my brain. It’s fucking torture.
When Daisy first left, I was haunted by her. Everywhere I turned, there was something to remind me of our time together. Every time my sister baked something with caramel, I’d imagine Daisy’s hair spread across my pillow as she slept peacefully beside me because that was the scent of her shampoo.
Every waking moment was filled with thoughts of her. I tortured myself with the whys and what ifs to the point of insanity. I was experiencing panic attacks numerous times a day.
I don’t know when it changed, but eventually I went from thinking of her every minute of every day, to only once in a while. I dreamt of her less as the years went on. Every now and then, thoughts of her would hit me unexpectedly, but they no longer hurt as much.
I no longer felt like I wanted to reach inside my chest and rip my own heart out.
And then, she went and fucking returned and all that progress went right out the goddamn window.
I massage my palm against the ache forming in my chest and shake my head as I stalk to my fridge and grab a beer.
I wasn’t planning on drinking anytime soon after the clusterfuck that was the last time but I’m holding onto the hope that a few beers will help sleep find me easier tonight.
I twist the cap off and toss it in the trash as I pass. Taking a seat in my trusty leather recliner, I reach for the TV remote just as there’s a heavy knock on my front door.
With a sigh, I place the TV remote back on the side table and stand, a frown etched into my brows.
I don’t know who the fuck would show up at my house unannounced at seven on a Tuesday night, but it better not be Noah looking for a cuddle buddy.
I pull the door open with a little more force than necessary, and my frown only deepens when I find Hunter standing on the other side, his arms folded across his chest. My eyes narrow as I try to read the serious expression on his face.
“Who died?” I ask, only half joking.
His brows furrow briefly before his arms drop to his sides and his features soften. “No one died. We do need to talk, though.”
Well, shit. That sounds… ominous.
“Come on in, then.” I hold the door open for him to enter. Hunter removes his cowboy hat as he steps into the living room and dread settles deep within me.
“You sure no one died?” I ask again, because why the fuck else is he acting so serious?
I run a nervous hand through my hair as I grab Hunter a beer and pass it to him. “Thanks. And I promise, no one is dead.”
Another thought strikes me then and my eyebrows shoot up. “It’s about Daisy, isn’t it? Are you here to tell me to stay away from the ranch?”
He shakes his head with a chuckle. “Nah, man. I’d never tell you to stay away from the ranch. It’d be a waste of time anyhow. I am here about Daisy, though.”
