Benedict did not know what pushed him to be so open to the point of her telling her all of that.
“Oh, Benedict. You’ve carried so much all on your own,” his mother said, running her palm down the side of his face. “This might not be what you wish to hear but not everyone is out to disappoint you and prove that you were right to be so distrustful. I still believe you should give her a chance. She just might be what you need, after all.”
Benedict mulled her words over. She had so easily disregarded his fear but perhaps she was right. There was a connection with Augusta that he’d never felt with anyone else before, not even after all the years he spent with her, doing all she wanted within a reasonable distance.
“Thank you for the talk, Mother,” he said quietly, getting up from the seat beside her and dusting himself off.
“Anytime, my sweet boy,” she said, her eyes fixed on him. The moonlight reflected the concern in her blue eyes. He had made her worry, although he wished he altogether hadn’t. he regretted baring it all for her to see, not when it involved making het worry like that.
“Goodnight Mother. Please go to bed at a reasonable hour. I’ll see you at breakfast,” he said, turning in the direction he’d come, his heart now laden with more questions although he he’d found the answers to some of them.
Am I ready to take the plunge?
Benedict trusted his mother’s words. However, when it came down to it, it was him who would bear the brunt of things if anything went wrong. He needed to make this decision by himself without thinking about the fact that his mother already liked Augusta enough to want her as her family.
Am I ready to make my relationship with her serious?
He knew now what he’d already known since the beginning but had been so overwhelmed by his feelings to keep in practice. Augusta was not a woman he could mess around with just because he was bored. She was innocent and pure, and although the fear still lingered, if he ever wanted to win her back, it would have to be for forever.
A knock sounded on his door late at night and Benedict sat up, confused until his mother stepped in, her smile melancholic. He had been unable to sleep after the conversation that they had, his head filling with questions that he couldn’t find the answers to.
“Is anything the matter, Mother?” he asked, his mind going into a panic as he moved closer to where she sat, waiting for her to speak.
“No, you need not worry yourself. Everything is just fine. I couldn’t sleep after the conversation we had and wished to speak with you,” she said, pushing an errant lock of hair back in place.
“What do you wish to speak of?” he asked her, waiting patiently for her to speak.
“I can tell, Benedict, that your feelings are clearly shaken and that you have finally found love. I’m glad to know that when I’m gone, you won’t be left all alone like I’d feared.”
Benedict took her hand in his. He was not one given to emotions but he hated the way she spoke like she knew something he didn’t.
“Don’t speak like that. There’s still so much for you to live for. You cannot be speaking of death so early. Besides, you never have to worry about me. I can take care of myself.”
She chuckled softly. “I assure you, my dear son, I don’t plan to go anywhere soon. Also, it’s a parent’s duty to worry about their children, no matter how old they are or the responsibilities that they carry.”
Before Benedict could say a word, she continued. “I didn’t come here to speak of any of these though. I have something to give to you and then I will leave you to go to sleep.”
She took out a ring from a small purse he didn’t realize she was holding and showed it to him. “This was the ring your father proposed with. It belonged to your grandmother before it was mine.”
She looked away, wiping her eyes discreetly. Benedict caught on but allowed her to have her moment to herself. “I have held onto this every night as I remember the days of our youthful courtship and how much effort your father put into making sure that I knew he loved me. I miss him every day and having this with me has always made the pain ease better.”
She turned his hand, placing the ring in his palm, and closed his hands. “It’s yours now, to give to the woman you love and wish to make your wife.”
Benedict shook his head and pushed it back into her hands. “No, Mother. I cannot take this if it means so much to you. You should keep it so you have the memory of father with you.”
His mother laughed, touching her palm to his cheek. “You always were so considerate when you were a child, and even now, you continue to maintain that trait, but you need not worry. What your father and I had was more than just a ring. This ring was the beginning of it but the memories we shared are forever stored in my heart. Now, the ring is yours, take it and create memories for yourself.”
Benedict took it from her hands. “Thank you, Mother, but how come you never gave it to me all this time?”
She sighed, patting him as she stood up. “I was never comfortable with the idea of passing it to Juliet some day when you chose to propose to her. I thought it was because I didn’t want to give it away, but now, seeing you with Augusta, it’s made me realize just how much time has passed and how much you have grown into your own person. She’d a wonderful lady and I wholeheartedly accept her into this family, which is why she must have this ring when you choose to propose.”
CHAPTER21
The morning sun bathed the breakfast room in a warm glow as Augusta and her family sat down for breakfast. She rushed through the food that was tasteless thanks to the heartbreak she was suffering as a result of her conversation with Benedict.
She drank her tea, careful to maintain a look of composure as she ate. The last thing she wanted was for her siblings to pick up on her strange behaviour and ask her what was wrong.
Augusta wanted nothing more than to go back to her room and remain there for the rest of the day. She had been unable to sleep all through the night, tossing and turning as she mourned her ignorance as to the true extent of pain her mother felt because of her rake of a father.
