“I wish you could understand. My reputation is in tatters. If I do not marry him, I have no future.”
Bridget sighed. “You know that marriage is not the only way to salvage your reputation. Time and distance would have done it also. To think that I already had a plan for you. For us. My father was going to speak to your father so that you would be allowed to come to Scotland with me for the rest of the year. We could have resided in Edinburgh with my aunt. Nobody knows you there. You could have established yourself there and let time pass. Once you returned, all would have been forgotten, replaced by another scandal.”
Penelope shook her head. She was touched that her friend would go to such length for her and yet, she knew it was all in vain. As a commoner, a rich one but a commoner all the same, her friend could never understand the pressure of being part of the nobility and the vicious nature of some within their class. Besides, her father would have found her living in exile in Scotland almost as unbearable as her being close by with a ruined reputation. To him, it would have been all the same.
“It would never work. You must believe me and trust that I know what I must do.”
Bridget’s shoulders dropped. “I trust you no more, and I never shall again. You were my dearest friend and I would have done anything for you. Anything at all. But I see now your mind is made up. And I still claim that this is what you always wanted. Intentionally or not, you caused this. You took the one man I truly wanted and made him your own. I can never forgive you, Penelope. Please, leave. I do not wish to see you again. Ever.”
She turned and walked out of the barn and Penelope could tell from her posture that she was crying as she went.
“Bridget! Come back, please.” She pleaded with her friend but she did not listen to her and instead walked away, out of the barn door and into the light.
Penelope stood for a moment, overwhelmed by what had transpired. She was not surprised, not truly, for she’d expected her friend to react in such a way. But to hear her say such harsh words, to end their friendship forever—it was hard to take. Especially on the one day she needed her friend the most.
Suddenly, she was aware that she wasn’t quite alone. Turning, she noticed that several stable hands had once again stopped working and were looking at her, having borne witness to the entire exchange. She swallowed and quickly made her way out of the building the way she’d come. However, it was impossible to ignore the stares and the whispers. And then, from somewhere within the stable, a voice called out louder than the others. A voice unashamed and unafraid.
“Shame! You bring shame to your family! Harlot!”
She stopped and turned, looking to where the voice had come but saw nobody. Whoever it was kept himself hidden well.
“He’s right. Look at her…” Someone else whispered.
“To think we thought her honorable,” said another.
Feeling hot and overwhelmed, she ran out of the barn and back toward the carriage. Daniel had squatted down and was leaning against the carriage wheel, his eyes closed and his face cast toward the rising sun. When he heard her approach, he turned and opened his eyes.
“Penny. What happened?”
Her impulse was to yell at him, to tell him he’d ruined her life and caused her to lose her best friend. But she reminded herself that it wouldn’t be right. She’d played her part in it all. And some of Bridget’s words were the truth. She could not deny it and taking out her anger on him would be wrong.
“I would rather not talk about it, if you do not mind.” Her voice was cracking and the devastation was audible with every word. He swallowed as he listened and his eyes softened as he looked at her. He stepped forward, one arm outstretched as if wanting to hug her but she turned away, feeling entirely undeserving of any affection.
He dropped his arm and instead motioned towards the back of the carriage. “Very well. I understand. Know I am here should you need to talk.”
“I will not, but I thank you regardless.” She climbed into the carriage unaided and sat, covering herself with the blanket while he stood and looked at her with worried eyes. He shut the door and returned to the box seat up front and the carriage moved once more.
Penelope had just settled in to her seat when her eyes fell on a little box on the seat beside her. It was carefully wrapped with twine tied around it, and under the twine was a note. Frowning, she took the note and unfolded it. She recognized his handwriting as it had not much changed since their childhood days.
Dear Penny,
I know this is not how either of us envisioned this day, nor our future. But know I will do my best to make everything right for you. You were always my friend—my dearest friend—and I care for nothing more than to ensure your safety. I hope you will accept this gift as a token of my affection and gratitude for all you have done for me. I saw it in a shop in London years ago and thought of you, but never found occasion to present you with it. Until now. It seemed fitting, considering the day.
Daniel
She placed the note beside her, not sure how to feel about it and took the box. With a beating heart, she undid the twine and lifted the lid. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw the contents and a gasp escaped her. There, before her, was an almost exact replica of her mother’s silver and white bandeau.
He remembered. Despite it all, despite the years and the changes we’ve undergone, he still remembered how much this means to me.
She blinked away tears and looked out toward the box seat, seeing the man seated high atop in a different light once again.
Chapter 32
Daniel drove the carriage through the countryside towards Banbury where he had arranged for a clergyman to marry them at ten o’clock in the morning. The vicar would also provide the two necessary witnesses. He turned his head as the sounds of her sobs drifted to his ear. Each sob was like a stab to his heart.
I can hardly bear it that she is in such despair at the thought of marrying me. And to make it all so much worse it seems she has lost her closest friend because of me. For she did not need to tell me the details of their conversation, it was evident by the look on her face, and by the severity of her tears.And now I fear my gift might have upset her further. Did she not like it? Did it bring back bad memories? It seems I can do nothing right.
He shook his head, consumed with self-hatred. He should never have returned to Oxfordshire. Why did he not simply appoint a steward from afar? Why did he not write to His Grace for help? He would have offered Mr. Percival’s help without Daniel ever having to set foot in the county. So, why had he? He was lost in thought, pondering the questions that raced through his mind and trying to make sense of the feelings in his heart when the outskirts of Banbury came into view.
