“Sam—”
“You were working,” she said, watching me. “And you were with Cole. Which is a good thing. You should be living your life. That’s how it should be.”
Swallowing hard, I nodded.
“I went to a meeting yesterday,” she said, fishing something out of her pants pocket. She held it up—a small white plastic chip that read24 hoursin gold-foiled letters. “They don’t have an ‘over two weeks’ chip, so they gave me the 24-hour one to symbolize the choice to be sober. It’s not much, but I’m trying. And I’m going to keep trying.”
“How did this happen? I want to be supportive—Iamsupportive—but I’m also…”
I winced, realizing suddenly that I was frightened. That’s what this was. I didn’t want to see her fail again. And I was being a dick because of it. My anger drained away, leaving me raw and ashamed.
“Look, I’m on board. And I’m happy for you. But please… make it make sense.”
She hesitated. “I guess I realized I could do this. If I wanted to. If I put the work in.”
“I just—help me understand. You woke up one day knowing you could suddenly change your whole life?”
Sam shrugged, looking abruptly miserable. “Yeah, I guess.”
“No, seriously. I’m proud of you. I swear,” I told her.
She must’ve believed me, because she nodded and let out a long breath. Something eased in her expression. Her eyes went glassy. Then she laughed and said, “You know what? I don’t think you’ve ever told me that before.”
“Well, I am,” I said firmly. “And I love you. I’ll love you no matter what, I promise.”
Sam gave me a trembling smile. “Thank you.”
“Let’s do this over. Congratulations on your new job.”
She laughed again. “Thanks.”
“Did you talk with someone?” I asked. “Maybe you called a hotline or something?”
Though they probably would’ve suggested a medical detox. Quitting alcohol cold turkey could be dangerous.
“No, I didn’t call anyone,” Sam said. Her brows knit together in a frown. “Um. I saw Cole, though. We talked.”
“You saw Nicolas?”
She nodded.
“When?”
“I don’t—I don’t remember. About two or three weeks ago, I guess.”
“What did he say to you?”
She faltered, eyes widening. She blinked rapidly, as if astonished. “I don’t remember that either. Shit, I must’ve blacked out. That’s probably why he was over. I must’ve scared him.”
A sliver of unease lodged deep inside me. Cole and I had spent nearly every waking moment together for the past two weeks, when I wasn’t working. I’d even slept over at his place a bunch.
He hadn’t mentioned speaking with Sam. He definitely hadn’t told me she was blacked-out drunk.
“Wait,” I said suddenly. The rest of what she’d said clicked into place. “Nicolas was here? In our house?”
Sam shrugged, giving me a strange look. “Yeah, I think so.”
“What happened? What do you remember?”
