I nudge Eden forward and we follow Dave out of the station and into the parking lot. I don’t know what time it is, but it’s dark and a cool breeze has picked up. I seriously doubt we’ll be continuing the Fourth of July celebrations now. We head over to Mom’s Range Rover, and when Eden and I pull open the back doors, we find that Chase is already asleep across the backseat. It’s ironic, really, that our parents are mad at us for getting arrested for trespassing when they are illegally cramming four of us into this backseat.
“What’d you do this time?” Jamie asks, studying me curiously.
My eyes flicker to meet Eden’s, and I can’t fight the smirk that toys at my lips. “Something I shouldn’t have.”
We climb in and I move Chase out of the way, and the four of us are squeezed in side by side again, and I honestly don’t know how I am to survive this drive back home. It was unbearable on the way here, and that was when Eden and I hadn’t even spoken yet. Now, it is going to be even worse having my body pressed against hers after kissing her an hour ago.
I am waiting for Dave to start yelling at me, but he is only silently sitting in the driver’s seat, gripping the steering wheel a little too tightly. Maybe he is keeping quiet because his daughter is here. Even if he is planning on saying something, he doesn’t get the chance to, because Mom turns up. She pulls herself up into the passenger seat and slams the door shut behind her again, then crosses her arms over her chest as she stares out of the windshield.
“Nice going, Mom,” I say in an effort to lighten the mood. I even sitforward and place my hand on her shoulder, trying to catch her eye. “You’re killing ’em.”
“Don’t even talk to me, Tyler,” she says, shaking my hand off her. She doesn’t turn around, or even so much as glance at me. She only continues to stare ahead out of the window at nothing. “One of these days I’m just not going to turn up. I’m so disappointed in you.”
“I’m disappointed in you too, Eden,” Dave finally speaks up. His voice isn’t as sharp or as acidic as it usually is, but it’s still coarse. He switches on the engine and begins to drive, navigating our way out of the parking lot. “What the hell were you doing inside in the first place? I’m pretty sure the event was outside.”
“No. The event was definitely inside,” I remark. I am looking at Eden out of the corner of my eye, absolutely loving the alarm that crosses her features when I say this. The fact that this is so wrong is almost…fun. Our parents can’t ever find out we were making out in that hallway. The secrecy is exhilarating, and I want to see just how much I can get away with. In the darkness of the backseat, I run my finger down Eden’s thigh.
“Cut it out with the attitude,” Mom snaps at me, and I realize that she really is mad at me tonight. “I just had to sign for both of you to get out of there when I could have easily just left you all night, okay? So here’s an idea, Tyler: just sit there and be quiet for once in your life.”
Damn. It’s rare that Mom talks to me like that. I don’t really take it to heart though. I know I drive her insane, and I know sheisallowed to get mad at me sometimes. I take her advice and keep quiet for the entire drive back home. I focus on Eden instead, on touching her inconspicuously whenever I get the opportunity. I brush my hand against hers, press my knee to hers. She is staring out of the window and her face is illuminated orange from the streetlights as we pass under them,lighting her up and letting her glow. It makes the drive go quicker than it did earlier, and it is nearing midnight by the time we are all spilling in through the front door. Dave has Chase in his arms, still fast asleep.
“I don’t even know what to say to you, Tyler,” Mom is murmuring as she locks the front door behind us. Dave is carrying Chase upstairs, and Jamie is following. “I’ve just—I’ve had enough.” She turns around to face me as she takes a deep breath. In her eyes, I can see how tired she is. “Eden, just go to your room. Get some sleep,” she says, and she gives her a tight smile, politely hinting for her to leave us alone for a second. Eden gets the memo, because she doesn’t even hesitate, only nods and heads upstairs.
I am left alone in the hall with Mom, and she walks through to the kitchen, so I follow her. I’m sort of embarrassed now. Ihatedoing this to her, so I keep my head low, too ashamed to meet her eyes.
“I know you’re having one of your bad days, Tyler,” she says quietly, her tone softening. She sighs and leans back against the countertop, pressing a hand to her face. “But…but please. Stop doing this. I’m worried you’re going to get yourself into more serious trouble one day.”
Like selling weed? I frown and give her a single, clipped nod to let her know I’m listening carefully. “I’m sorry, Mom,” I say. I am. I’m sorry that I amalwaysgoing to let her down.
“I know you are,” she says as she stares back across the kitchen at me. The smile she gives me is sad again. I tear her apart sometimes, and I really wish I didn’t. “Goodnight, Tyler.”
“Night,” I mumble, and I turn around and leave the kitchen. I head upstairs for my room, but before I get there, I spot Eden disappearing into hers. We didn’t exactly cover everything we talked about tonight, like: What happens now? Before she closes her door, I quickly step into her room. She spins around and flinches at my sudden appearance.“Hey,” I whisper. I study her room for a minute, not exactly sure what I’m even going to say.
“Hi,” she says blankly. “What’d your mom say?”
“Nothing,” I say. I think Eden’s still mad at me for getting her arrested, so I decide to start by apologizing. “Sorry for taking you down with me. I should have just left when the cop told us to.”
She frowns. “It’s fine.”
I am about to say something more, to ask her about what happens between us now, but my ringtone cuts through the silence. My phone is vibrating in my jeans, and I quickly pull it out to find Tiffani’s name flashing on my screen.Please not now. She always calls me if it gets to midnight and we haven’t talked that day yet.
“Tiffani,” I tell Eden. Sometimes I just ignore her calls, but I really can’t afford to do that right now. Not when she is currently blackmailing me. Right now, I need to keep her happy, because when Tiffani isn’t, she makes it known. “Sorry, I gotta talk to her. She’ll get mad if I ignore her. I’m sorry,” I say, glancing back at Eden. She is staring at me with wide eyes, and she looks almost pale again. I feel like such an asshole. I tell Eden I’m attracted to her and I kiss her, then I ditch her to answer a call from my girlfriend? My phone is still buzzing in my hand. “I’m really sorry. I have to,” I whisper. I feel so guilty. I wish I could explain. I wish she knew that it’s complicated.
The call will end if I don’t answer it, and Eden’s crushed expression is too much to bear, so I quickly turn around and leave. As I’m walking into my own room and closing the door behind me, I answer the call and press my phone to my ear. There is no emotion or enthusiasm in my voice when I say, “Hey, what’s up?”
“Happy Fourth of July, baby!” Tiffani squeals down the line, and I almost hurl my phone straight across my room.
39
Five Years Earlier
My brothers and I race downstairs first thing on Saturday morning, elbowing each other out of the way as we fight to be the first to burst into Mom and Dad’s bedroom. In unison, we sing out, “Happy birthday, Dad!”
They’re both already awake. Mom is sitting in front of her dresser, applying her makeup, and Dad is pulling on a T-shirt. It’s the weekend, so neither of them have work today. The sun is streaming into the room, and the smell of coffee is in the air. “You guys are up early!” he says as he turns around to look at us with a beaming smile on his face. Chase runs over to give him a hug, and Dad crouches down to draw him into his arms. Jamie joins them, but I don’t. I linger by the door instead, watching their embrace.
“Are you going to turn gray now?” Chase asks.
“I sure hope not for another twenty years!” Dad says, running both his hands through his thick, black hair as he straightens back up again.
