“Your walls,” she says, but her voice is shaking. Is she scared of me again? Is it because I’m angry? Or is she scared of herself? “Your walls interest me.”
My heart skips a beat.Oh, shit. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I lie, but it is nowhere near convincing.
“I didn’t realize it until now,” she continues. She is anxiously chewing at the inside of her mouth as she looks down at the floor. It’s almost like she’s thinking it through in her head, gathering her thoughts. Her eyes flick back up to meet mine. “You’ve got walls up and they interest me.”
“You know what? I don’t care,” I say defensively. Shecan’tfigure me out. I have gone all these years without anyone breaking me down into pieces and analyzing me, and the thought of Eden noticing the cracks in my life is almost too much to bear. “Think whatever you want about me.”
“Think whatever I want?” she repeats, and her voice gets stronger, like she is shifting back into the Eden I’ve thought was pretty cool over the past few weeks. The Eden who doesn’t back down, the Eden who challenges me, the Eden who isn’t afraid to tell me the truth. “I think that you infuriate me,” she begins, narrowing her eyes. “I think that you are an arrogant jackass who can never simply be nice to someone, because it doesn’t fit in with the act you’re putting on.”
Clearly, I have slipped up on my Tyler Bruce performance one too many times, because she can see straight through it all. She knows it’s all just an act. She knows it isn’t me, but Iwanther to think that it is. I don’t want her to ever figure out that I’m really just fragile and broken. “You have no idea what you’re saying,” I tell her.She’s wrong.
“Let me finish,” she says, and she inhales a breath of air. “I also think that you’re a jerk. Your ego is too big for your own head and you think that you look cool by being a badass. But really, Tyler? You just look pathetic.”
Stop fucking saying that! I almost scream it at her, but I bite my tongue and fight to keep my anger from exploding. I tell her I’m attracted toher, and she turns around and throws it in my face like this. It hurts. I should have left while I had the chance. “Alright, now I just look like a moron coming up here and telling you that I’m attracted to you,” I say. “You could’ve let me down easier.”
Her lips press together, her eyes twitch as they narrow. “I thought someone as badass as you could handle it.”
She is challenging me again. I shove my hands into my pockets and think about her words for a minute, turning back to the window. The fireworks are still lighting up the sky and I watch them in silence, listening to the popping and the crackling. Maybe there is a very small part of me thatlikesthe idea of Eden figuring me out. It’s a terrifying thought, having someone know my darkest secrets, but a tiny fraction of my being is almost begging for it. I try to fight against it, to push people away, but deep within me, all I really want is forsomeoneto finally understand me. Someone who will tell me that everything will be okay one day. Someone who will tell me thatI’llbe okay. I glance over my shoulder at Eden. “And I thought you’d figured out that I’m not really a badass,” I whisper. This is me. This is Tyler.
Eden’s eyes are locked on me. There are several feet between us, but she stares across the hallway at me through the silence. The bright, neon colors of the fireworks are still flashing in her eyes. So many different emotions are flickering in her gaze. At first, confusion. Then surprise. And finally, a fear that I recognize all too well. It’s the same fear I felt on Saturday night after I realized that not only did I just kiss my stepsister, but that I also liked her.
“I think,” she whispers, “that I’m attracted to you too.”
What? My heart really does stop this time. I turn away from the windows, angling my body back toward Eden. Surprise fills me, but so does doubt. “You are?” I ask, but my voice doesn’t even sound like mine.
“I am,” she says. She squeezes her eyes shut for a moment, and I can see her swallow hard. “I’m sorry.”
“Stop apologizing,” I tell her.Why is she saying sorry? This is exactly what I wanted to hear, but she looks absolutely terrified. It’s a heavy realization to swallow, I know, but it’s one I am willing to accept. I hope she is too. Slowly, I move near her, only stopping when I am standing a mere inch or two away from her. “Don’t regret anything.”
Her gaze flicks up from the ground to meet mine. I am looking down into her eyes, at all of the colors shining within them, but I only see hazel. I want to kiss her again. I amdyingto. I want to feel her lips pressed to mine again. I want to feel her skin against my own. I reach out to touch her elbow, lightly brushing my fingertips all the way down her arm to her wrist. Then, I move my hand to her waist.
“What’s happening?” Eden whispers. She is quivering under my touch. She is tense; she isn’t breathing again. She can’t even look at me; she is watching the fireworks. I trace circles on her hip with my thumb, and my eyes never leave her face. I can feel our adrenaline radiating between us. She wants this too. I move my mouth to her jaw and brush my lips against her soft, soft skin. She is warm and comforting, and I kiss every inch of her skin from her jaw to her mouth. I hover by the corner of her lips.
The silence feels too fragile to break, but I dare myself to whisper, “Let me kiss you.”
“But you’re my stepbrother.” Her voice is barely audible as she forces the words out through a breath of air, and she is frozen in place, my mouth so, so close to hers.
“Just don’t think about it,” I murmur, and I can’t bear it any longer, so I take her lips in my own.
They are so plump and so perfect, and I kiss her in a way I’ve neverkissed anyone else before. I kiss her so softly, so gently, taking in the sensation of her mouth against mine once more, and I don’t think I will ever get enough of it. I tune out everything else around me. I tune out the fireworks. I tune out a distant voice that is calling. I am focusing on only this moment, on my heartbeat rocketing against my chest, on Eden. I pull her closer against me, deepening the kiss, quickening the pace. I want to explore every inch of her, and I can’t stop my hands from moving. My fingers are wrapped in her hair, I am touching the small of her back, and I am pulling her against me until her body is molded into mine. My pulse is racing with the electricity and my head is spinning. She is giving me full control, working in sync with my movements, and I slow the kiss back down again. Moving my fingertips to her chin, I tilt her head up so that I can kiss her even deeper. And God, it’s amazing.
“Alright, wrap it up,” the distant voice is calling out, tearing through the bubble I’m in and bursting it completely. Even Eden has suddenly gone rigid. “Cut it out already!”
“Dammit,” I mutter as I reluctantly pull away from Eden. The moment is ruined now anyway. I drop my hands from her body and throw them back through my hair as I turn around to face the jackass who has interrupted us. It’s a cop. A Culver City police officer is staring at me, glaring sharply at us, and I fold my arms across my chest as I glare evenly back at him. It’s so instant, so subtle, that I barely even realize I have switched straight back into my Tyler Bruce facade until I hear myself growling, “You got a problem?”
“You are trespassing,” the officer states, his voice firm. He looks me up and down suspiciously, eyeballing the hell out of me, and then Eden.
“Trespassing?” I repeat. Is he kidding me? Is he on a power trip or something? “Don’t you have better things to do? Like sorting out those drunk fights out there on the field?” I nod to the windows, to themasses outside as the fireworks continue to shower the black sky in an array of colors. It’s July Fourth. I am pretty sure there are more serious matters to be dealing with.
“Enough with the attitude,” the officer barks at me. He places his hands on his hips, resting on his duty belt. “This school is closed apart from the designated hallways. You are trespassing and I am giving you the chance to leave by yourself before I have to make you.”
“Make me?” I almost laugh out loud. Is he threatening to drag me out of here? It’s really not that serious. “Can’t you just give us a second? We’ll get out of here, but you kind of interrupted something.”
“Tyler, just come on,” Eden is mumbling. She is tugging at the hem of my shirt, begging me to drop it and just leave, but Tyler Bruce doesn’t back down. I stand my ground, refusing to let her pull me away.
“Yes, I figured I interrupted something,” the officer replies, his voice dripping with sarcasm, and he fires us both a disgusted glance. Was he watching us the entire time? What a creep. “I’m not asking to reason with you,” he says. “I’m asking you to leave, and I expect you to do it. Don’t try to waste my time, son.”
“It’s a goddamn hallway,” I remind him, throwing up my hands. This is bullshit. I’ll leave, but not until I get to finish what I started with Eden, not until I get to kiss her again without interruptions. “It’s not like we’re sneaking around the White House. Just give us five minutes.”
