I shake my head to clear it. Fuck! No question she’s a witch. I stand taller when I realize that I’ve leaned toward her like everyone else. All of us motionless on a giant, collective inhale. Even the servers have stopped working, paused in their journey toward the kitchen or bar to stare, gap-jawed and glassy-eyed. The bartender holds a bottle aloft in one hand as if he’s forgotten what he was doing with it, as a single tear frees itself from the corner of his eye. He notices me watching him and swallows, then continues making his drink.
For the life of me, I can’t tell if this is a spell or just her. She’s talented. If this had been the audition a year ago, Crew and Gregg would have signed her immediately. I snort. I’m getting ahead of myself. I’m here to get her help as a witch. Then again, hearing this, makes it far easier to offer her something in exchange.
“Your claws
They scrape and tear
Sink deep
Catch me unaware
* * *
I cut you out
All you’re about
Cut out parts
I never knew I needed.
* * *
Am I getting smaller?
Am I losing my way?
Is it any better when
you succeed in stopping the pain?
Or are you just a monster,
saving it up for a rainy day?
Who brings it all down heavy in
the most unbearable way?
Cutting me smaller…
I’m cutting…cutting…
cutting me smaller.
Until I fade away.”
* * *
I order another drink at the bar. The bartender pours it and pushes the glass across the counter toward me. “She’s really good,” he mumbles.
I’m about to agree when my inner dragon grabs my psychological wheel and gives a possessive growl.
“Huh?” The bartender holds a hand to his ear.
I clear my throat and say, “Thank you.” With a lift of my glass, I slink back to my spot against the wall. What was that all about? Was my dragon really just jealous of Zoe’s distant praise by the bartender? Fucking alignment. I shove him down deep, lean against the wall, and concentrate on Zoe.
For the next hour and a half, I listen to her sing song after song about freedom and sacrifice, about addiction and recovery, about sin and redemption. Her music is moving but also has a hypnotic beat. I catch myself tapping my toe more than once.
