I think back to Olivia, how she couldn’t find a vampire who had the guts to change her. How excited she’d been to tell me about her change. I should have asked more questions. I should have known what was going into my body.
“I don’t want to talk about this now,” I squeak. “I’m so tired. I just want this nightmare to be over. I want to go home.”
“Valeska killed you in that dome, Eloise. She broke your neck. That’s the last step—a vampire has to kill you. Valeska had no idea that Marabella had primed you to turn. When you awoke, you awoke… You are… a vampire. That’s why you can see in the dark and why you can feel the dawn coming. It’s also why you’re hungry. You need blood.”
Hot tears run down my cheeks. “I don’t want to be a vampire.”
He wipes my tears away with his thumbs. “I know. I didn’t want this for you either. Not like this. As much as I wanted you to be with me forever, I didn’t want it to happen like this.”
“Forever…”
“You’re immortal now. As immortal as I am.”
I stand, realizing I’m completely naked. I spread my hands and look down at myself.
“Your clothes were torn and soaked with blood. I retrieved your clean things from Marabella’s while you were sleeping.” He points to the stack on top of the dresser.
My brain circles around the truth that’s impossible to deny. I am a vampire. I stretch my fingers, my toes. Pressing a palm to my chest, I feel nothing. My heart isn’t beating. Panic rises in me at the thought. I did not consent to being turned, and the idea that I am now the same species as Valeska turns my stomach. Or maybe that feeling is the endless hunger that’s seemed to gnaw at me since the challenge. Do I want to be a vampire?
I move across the room with a grace that isn’t mine. It’s like I’m inhabiting someone else’s skin. My movements are too fast, too certain. I realize the green light cast across the clothing on the dresser comes from my own eyes.
I’ll never see the sun again. I’ll have to survive by drinking blood.
I frown, wondering if the process could be reversed if that was my choice. But when I turn to ask Damien as much, his words sink in. I am now immortal, Damien’s true equal. I’ve always planned to eventually return to Tenebris with him. Now we have nothing but time, and his night world will suit me perfectly. When I came here to free Damien, I was ready to die for him. I guess I did. How lucky is it for both of us that it wasn’t the end? My stomach growls loud enough for Damien to hear.
“You’re hungry because you need to feed,” he says softly.
And then I remember something. “George is my sire? Does that mean he can compel me?”
“He freed you from the sire bond. Remember? After you refused the crown, he told you you were free. The sire bond was their backup plan, just in case you decided you wanted to take over where Valeska left off.”
“Oh my God.” I grab my head as pain slices through it. My hands start to shake. I’m weak, hungry. I need to feed. “I… don’t think I can use a donor.” My voice cracks. “The idea of biting a human, especially after working at Marabella’s… I don’t think I can make myself do it. It’s too intimate.” My words choke off, and I shake my head.
He crosses to me and takes my hands in his. I meet his eyes and remember why I chose this path. I love Damien. With him standing naked before me, I get the full sense of him even in his humanlike form. Desire rushes through me. Only it doesn’t come with the usual quickening of my pulse. Instead, my fangs elongate and throb with need. I raise a hand to cover my mouth, embarrassed.
Gently, he guides it away again. “It’s nothing to be embarrassed about, but if you do not feed, you will eventually die.”
I nod. “Maybe an animal. You said I could survive on deer?”
“You will feed from me, little bird,” he says, as if the idea I’d take blood from anyone or anything else is preposterous.
My mind quiets. “What?”
“I have never offered my blood to another. What Valeska took was not freely given. But I offer it to you. My blood as a shade can sustain you. More than sustain you. My blood is stronger than human blood.”
My fangs throb. My stomach clenches. Thirst, like fire, blazes in my throat. My eyes settle on the subtle pulse of the vein in his neck.
“I am told that this first feeding is the most important for you, that it completes your transition. I want it to be me, Eloise. We are already bound by heart and soul, why not blood?”
I open my mouth to say something, but my throat is too dry. All my thoughts fade away, replaced by a single focus, the lub dub of his heart and the scent of the blood it pumps through his veins.
He takes me by the hand and leads me to the bed, sitting on the edge so that we’re face-to-face. “It will be easiest for you to hit the vein if you straddle me.”
He pulls me toward him, and I do as he suggests, planting a knee on each side of his hips.
“You’re so warm,” I rasp. My voice is shot. My throat too dry to say much. My other senses though are sharper than ever. I close my eyes at the pleasure of the skin-to-skin contact. Touching him is like stroking sun-warmed velvet.
He chuckles, and the rumble travels through my own chest. “You’re ice-cold because you haven’t fed.” He tips his head. “Please, my little dragon.”
