“But the loss of control, the inconvenience of losing yourself, you don’t think of that as a curse?I mean, before we perfected the Rivergate boundary, I used to wake up worrying I might have hurt someone.”
“You hate who you are, and you love her because she makes you not you.That’s understandable, I guess.But surprising.You seem so confident.”Meredith crossed her legs at the ankle.
“I don’t hate who I am!”
“But you’d change it if you could.You’d give up the night air in your nose and the thrill of running as fast as your four legs will carry you.You’d give up the freedom and the intimacy with your packmates.”
Silas thought for a moment.“No.I wouldn’t give it up.Not permanently.”
“Then what’s the draw for you?Is it because she’s… you know…” She turned toward him and bobbed her eyebrows lasciviously.“Experienced?”
Silas did a double take.“I am not talking about this with you.”
“Truly, why did you love her?You’re an alpha werewolf, and she’s a prostitute.You could have anyone.Why her?”
Taking a deep breath, Silas parted his lips to answer but ended up sighing heavily.“What does it matter?It’s over.A year ago, I asked her to marry me, and she said no.That’s all she wrote.”
Meredith tucked her chin, her expression morphing from smug and teasing to horrified.“Can you even marry her?Would the pack allow that?”
“It’s a moot point, isn’t it?”he said harshly.“She said no.And honestly, I think it was for the best.”
Meredith grimaced.“I am the world’s biggest asshole,” she said.“I’m sorry, Silas.I didn’t realize it was that serious between you two.”
He nodded slowly.“Wasis the key word in that sentence.I’m glad it didn’t work out.The further I get away from it, the more I realize it wasn’t meant to be.And yep.You arethebiggest asshole.”
She flipped him the finger.A beacon of light washed over them—light that came from a woman who was descending the steps of the bordello.
“That’s her, isn’t it?”
“Yes.”
“She’s beautiful.It’s like… It’s like…”
“Staring into the sun,” Silas murmured.
“Yeah.”
A limousine had pulled up to the curb at the end of the walkway.The demon?The door opened without any assistance from the driver or anyone else for that matter.Soleil slipped into the back, and the limo took off.Silas closed the laptop.Behind the wheel again, he tailed the limo, careful to keep his distance.
“I had a boyfriend like that once,” Meredith said.
“You had a boyfriend who glowed in the dark?”
She snorted.“No.He wasn’t fae or anything.Just a shifter.But he had this sort of charisma.Like, you looked at him and everything just seemed easier.It was like you weren’t in reality anymore but in a movie where everything was scripted, and you knew things would turn out all right because this guy… this intensely attractive guy… lovedyou.”
“So what went wrong?”Silas asked.
“Oh, he was as dumb as a box of rocks.Accidentally lit himself on fire.”
Silas raised an eyebrow at her.
“Okay, I set him on fire.”
“You set?—”
“I set myself on fire.”
Silas curled his upper lip.
