I back up into the wall, my fury sapped and replaced with hopelessness and genuine surprise at what a terrible person I can be.
“Damn it,” I sniffle as the acid builds in my eyes and my throat. “Sorry. I’m sorry.”
Outside, Aker’iz is cooing and gurgling happily, and Kenz’ox’s deep voice sounds soft and gentle as he plays with her.
I can’t hold back sore sobs as I sag to the ground, my hands in front of my mouth to not be too loud. But it’s not working.
A shadow crosses the opening, and the hatch closes from the outside.
Yeah. Kenz’ox wants to keep my craziness well away from his baby.
Looks like the jungle is not only inside my safe place anymore. It’s insideme.
6
–Kenz’ox–
I sit back down and lift Aker’iz onto my lap. “She has lost her friend. And I think many things have changed for her. We will let her grieve in peace. Some of us sometimes make noises like a diving irox, you know. Can you guess who?”
The baby reaches up with chubby fingers and whimpers, her blue eyes as clear as a calmly running creek.
I lean down so she can examine my face with her hands. “You guess it’sme?Well, perhaps—ow! See, you have claws like an irox, too. We may have to do something about that.”
I lean away from the sharp little fingernails that scratched my cheek.
The little face contracts in a way that I know very well, but I don’t want her to scream right now—Dorie clearly needs some quiet and time to herself. Any warrior who’s lost a friend knows the feeling.
I stand up and hold Aker’iz in front of me while I walk around the little clearing. “We have had some big changes ourselves, you and I,” I say softly, knowing that the baby can’t understand me. But I like talking to her. “And we owe Dorie a lot. She saved both our lives last night. I will tell you about it later. In a few years, when you can understand the skill it took. It was unbelievable.”
I make sure to keep moving, the way Aker’iz prefers. “Notice the tracks. There were several women here. And one strange warrior who seems to have climbed trees easily. He must have cut down these trees that lie around us. It’s a wall, you see. He wanted to keep the Bigs and Smalls away. There are also traps on the outside. They are easy for us to spot, but maybe not for a curious Big.”
Some of those women left this place, this safest spot in the jungle. Why would they do that? It’s all puzzling, but I will ask Dorie later, when her grief has abated somewhat.
It’s a well-ordered little spot. There is a vat for boiling oil from Bigs to fuel lamps. A rack for treating the skin from Bigs. A pottery wheel and a small kiln for pottery. A food store underground and two piles of firewood, a well-made canopy that can be put over the campfire, tools and spears, and all the things that a small village needs. The only thing I can’t see is a source of fresh water, but I keep hearing the roar in the distance, so there is clearly a great amount of water nearby.
“Let’s look at the lake that’s not a lake,” I tell Aker’iz as I walk through the last patch of dense jungle that the roar comes from.
When I see it, all I can say is, “Oh…”
If it’s a lake, it must be the biggest one on Xren. I can’t even see the other side. It’s as if the land just stops. A long beach stretches away on each side, and I can’t see where it ends.
Big waves crash lazily onto the beach from far away, making that constant roar I thought might be a waterfall. Yes, this should be enough water for any tribe.
“What do you think?” I ask Aker’iz. “Have we reached the end of the world?”
She complains, kicks her legs, and waves her arms, telling me to keep walking.
We go all the way down to the edge of the water. There’s a lot of white foam here, as well as heaps of wood that must have drifted in from other parts of the lake. A cool breeze plays with the fine hairs on Aker’iz’s head. “This is nice. Our new home is better than our old one. And here, nobody wants us dead.”
I walk slowly along the beach. It’s the end of my mission to find a safe place for Aker’iz. Now we have to make our lives here. In a strange, alien ship, by the side of a lake that indeed is not a lake, away from the old tribe.
“We will never see them again,” I say into the breeze. “None of them. Why did they try to stop me? Cerep’oz and Hart’ox and Vrep’ix—they should have known better! You don’t ambush a tribesman! If they wanted to stop me, they should have fought me in honest combat! Then they would have lived. I wouldn’t have had to kill them. But they left me no choice!” My fists tighten at the memory of that night.
Aker’iz notices my darkening mood and gives off a whimper.
“You’re right,” I tell her. “We don’t need them. We have a home now. There’s a meaning to this. The Ancestors led us to this place for a reason. And Dorie… she must have been sent by them as well. Somehow.”
Aker’iz babbles something, and I turn around to go back to the ship. Something catches my attention, and I squat down to examine the sand. The tracks are faint but clear enough. And it makes sense. But it’s bad news, and that’s not what we need right now. “Let’s not tell Dorie about this. Not a word, Aker’iz.”
