And his.
There was no doubt.
“My God.” The words were torn from him.
Sidney was no longer capable of coherent thought, speech. Unaware he was moving. His body was functioning on its own, separate from his shattered mind. And suddenly, he stood before Julianna and her daughter—his daughter,theirdaughter. He trembled, emotion rising in his throat. His eyes burned.
“Emily,” he said, reaching for her.
The baby clapped her chubby hands exuberantly. “Pa!” she cried.
“Yes.” He tried to smile. In truth, he could not be certain his lips curved. His face felt numb.
“It is one of her favorite sounds,” Julianna said, as if to quash the incipient notion, burgeoning in his head, that his daughter had recognized her father at first sight. “She does not know you.”
The reminder was crushing.
He jerked his gaze away from his daughter, to her mother. “And whose fucking fault is that, Julianna?”
She winced at his language. “Do not utter epithets before my daughter, Shelbourne.”
He was not accustomed to being around children or watching his tongue. Or being polite. In truth, he had spent much of the last two years wallowing in incivility to its greatest degree. He had no wish for society or rules. He had burned through his life like the Great Fire.
Nary a regret.
Save one.
Never mind that.
“I want to hold her,” he said through a voice that had gone suddenly thick.
Thick with emotion. With love. Helovedthis small being. This beautiful baby who looked so much like him. This baby who was his daughter.
He was still astounded. It was momentous. His emotions, his understanding, all of it bigger than he was.
Julianna was holding their daughter in a protective embrace, as if she was reluctant to entrust Emily to him. As if she feared he would somehow hurt her.
Christ.He would never, ever hurt this innocent, sweet child. He knew then and there that he would do anything, give any part of himself,everypart of himself, to keep her safe. To protect her always.
He was never going to be apart from her again.
“Julianna,” he prodded. “Give her to me. Let me hold her. You owe me this much.”
She owed him far, far more. And he would collect.
But now was not the time. Nothing would spoil this perfect meeting. This reunion with the daughter who should have been born knowing him. He ached for all he had lost.
“She is shy,” Julianna said, still hesitating. “She prefers to be held by either myself or her nurse when she is not toddling about on her own.”
“Pa!” Emily said, smiling. “Pa!”
Hell.Could the woman not see their daughter was not frightened of him?
He spared her another glance, frowning. “Julianna.”
Mouth tightening, she offered their daughter to him with obvious reluctance. Emily was lighter than he had expected. She weighed the equivalent of a bird, he was sure. So precious in her linen gown, eyes wide.
Hiseyes, staring back at him.
