“Your relationship is with me, darling.” His smile turned grim. “You are my wife. You are his lover. One has far more permanence than the other.”
Oh, how she loathed his stubborn insistence that they would remain tied to each other. She wanted freedom. It had been within her reach at last, as had the chance to become a mother.
“Tom has promised to give me what I want, which is more than I can say for you or any other man,” she said truthfully, before she could ponder the ramifications of such a statement.
Needham, however, seized upon it, his dark eyebrows quirking. “Indeed, darling wife? Tell me, Nellie sweet, what has Sidmouth promised to give you that I have not?”
She refused to look away from his gaze. “Children.”
THE LONE WORDhung in the air between them.
Children.
Nell wanted to become a mother.
Having been raised by a mother who had been far too young when she had borne him, and suffering a cold, icy father, Jack had not wanted children as soon as they had wed. He had instead taken every effort, in fact, to avoid such a prospect, thinking it important for them to grow together. To know each other. To spend time drinking wildly, having parties, making love in every bloody chamber.
The thought of his child in Nell’s womb filled him with a burst of longing so strong and sudden, he nearly trembled beneath the force of it.
The thought of another man putting his child there first made him want to commit murder.
“I can give you children,” he told her, stating the obvious as he struggled to make sense of her revelation. “You are my wife. Say the word, and we can retire upstairs and begin our attempts now. Bloody hell, we can begin right here.”
She shook her head, her expression pinched. “No. I do not want children with a man I cannot trust.”
Devil take it.How could he prove to her he was worthy of her trust? He had not known the answer to that question three years ago any more than he knew the answer now. And each conversation with her was akin to running into a brick wall. Just when he thought they were making progress, she proved implacable once more.
“Do you love Sidmouth?” he demanded, the very question filling him with a bitter burst of agony.
If she loved another, how could he force her to stay? He, too, had his pride.
Her nostrils flared. Before she could answer, however, a knock sounded at the library door. Of all the rotten timing…
“Enter,” he bit out.
Reeves appeared at the threshold. “Lord Sidmouth has arrived, my lord, my lady.”
“Tell him to return from whence he came,” Jack bit out.
“Bring him to me here, Reeves,” Nell said simultaneously. “My feet are quite aching, I find.”
The butler looked from Jack to Nell.
“If you attempt to keep me from seeing him, I will find a way,” Nell warned, her voice low.
Curse her, she likely would. And wind up injuring herself worse than she already had in the process. Or, worse, running off with the bastard. Jack could not countenance either of those outcomes. “Bring him to the library, if you please.”
“As my lord and my lady wish.” Reeves bowed, and then disappeared.
Jack turned back to his wife. “You did not answer my question.”
She blinked at him. “I have forgotten what you asked.”
He would wager everything he had that she had not. “I asked you if you love Sidmouth.”
“That is none of your affair.” She stood suddenly, crying out as she did so.
He rose as well, reaching for her. “Damn it, Nell, your feet are raw. You should not have even walked this far from your chamber.”
