And stupidly, quietly, dangerously…
It feels nice.
It feels familiar.
It feels like maybe something in me is thawing.
I’m still trying to talk myself out of that feeling when I hear?—
“Mama! Mama!”
Laddie comes sprinting back toward me, snow spraying behind him like rooster tails. He’s dragging another kid with him — a little boy with bright red gloves and a crooked helmet.
“Who’s this?” I ask as they skid to a stop.
“This is Dawson,” Laddie says, breathless with excitement. “He’s in my class!”
Dawson grins up at me, then swivels to look at Liam… and juststares.
Like he’s starstruck.
Like, Liam is some sort of celebrity or superhero.
“Your dad’s tall,” Dawson says to Laddie, pointing straight at Liam.
I freeze.
Liam freezes.
Even the wind seems to freeze.
Laddie looks confused. “He’s not?—”
But Dawson barrels on. “Well, helookslike your dad. You both got the same face!”
Laddie’s brows furrow as he studies Liam like he’s trying to solve a puzzle he just now realizes exists.
Before I can do damage control, Dawson claps his mittens together and blurts:
“Hey, mister! If you aren’t Laddie’s dad, can you pretend to be my dad for one day? My dad’s really boring. You look like you’d be fun.”
Liam’s eyes go wide.
My stomach drops straight into the snow.
And Laddie…
Laddie looks between them with this dawning, curious expression.
“Mama?” he says softly. “Why does Dawson say Mr. Callaghan looks like me?”
My chest tightens so sharply that I grab the edge of my jacket.
Liam looks at me over Laddie’s head, helpless, hopeful, terrified.
I kneel down as Laddie steps closer, small hands resting on my shoulders.
I can’t do it anymore.
