“Mmhhmm. Right. Okay. I’m going.”
I can’t allow myself time to chicken out.Just walk right up to the door and ring the bell. Oh. My. Gosh.My heart might actually explode right inside my chest.Are my hands sweating?My hands are definitely sweating.Shit, will she want to shake my hand? Who is SHE? Have I already decided that he does have a whole ass family in there?
The door. The doorbell. I have panicked all the way to the front door. It’s either time to run or time to sack up.You are Vaughn, mother fuckin’ Webb. You will sack up, and you will be fine with whatever happens when this door opens. You are a bad bitch. You have always been a bad bitch. You will be a bad bitch long after this day is over.
DING DONG!
The doorbell is the generic ding dong sound, but it sounds like thunder to my anxiety-riddled ears.I should not have come here. This is not going to go well. No matter what happens here, I’m either shattered or embarrassed. Neither emotion sounds fun.Thoughts are still racing through my head when I hear the clink of the doorknob. Someone has grabbed it from the inside. It’s turning. The door is opening. My heart has hit light speed, and this cannot be healthy.
Once the door opens enough that I can see who’s on the other side, my heart reaches a whole new unhealthy when it stops. It’s a woman...a gorgeous woman...holding a beautiful little boy. He’s kind of huge, but definitely a toddler.
“Hi there. Can we help you?”
Her mouth is incredible. She has these full lips that frame perfectly squared, white teeth. Her top lip doesn’t have that dip in the middle.What’s that called? Cupid’s bow.She doesn’t have a Cupid’s Bow. She does have beautiful porcelain skin, though. She’s taller than me.She’s prettier than me. Like a lot. It’s not even that close, really.
“Ma’am, can I help you?”
Shit! She’s talking to me, and I’m ogling her. Turn the smile on full blast.
“Yeah. Oh. Yeah, I’m sorry. Uh, Mrs. Wilmington?”
Her face falls into a mock sad expression.
“No. I’m sorry. We’re the Washington’s. I’m Mrs. Washington.”
My heart.Wow.It turns out that the shattering still hurts even after the heart has stopped beating. I mean, I think it’s stopped beating anyway. I don’t know how it could still beat when it’s in so many pieces on this beautiful porch.
“I think you have the wrong house. I’m so sorry, but I don’t know any Wilmingtons on this street.”
Finally, my wits somewhat return. Enough, at least, that I can speak to this bombshell with a smiling toddler on her hip.
“Oh gosh. Must have the wrong address. So sorry for bothering you and...”
“Abel. Abel Elijah Washington.”
Fuck, that stings.Hopefully, my smile doesn’t give away any of the pain I feel.
“That’s a strong name. And he’s beautiful.”
“Oh gosh. I know, right? I carry him for nine months for him to come out looking exactly like his dad. I wouldn’t have named him after him if I’d known there’d be nothing of me in his looks either. Now he’s just all dad.”
Huh. She’s right, too. He looks exactly like Eli. Right down to those icy blue eyes and...damn it. Those dimples.
That’s it. That’s my limit.Stepping backward toward the steps, I choke out something like “Sorry for the trouble. Cute baby.” My race to the car is zig zagged and I even stumble once before I reach the door. This is because I can’t actually see where I’m going through the tears.
Chapter 22
Elijah
“All right. Got it working. Good as new.”
“Yay! Thank you so much. We can always count on you. Isn’t that right, Abel?”
Abigail is smooshing her face with Abel’s as she’s kissing him all over the face and talking about “genius boy” and “sweetest boy”. They’re both so great. They deserve better than me. They deserve better than what I’ve done. No matter what she says, she can’t forgive me for something I can’t even forgive myself for.
“Alright, hey, I’m going to get out of here for a bit. I’ll be back tonight.”
Abigail’s expression is one I’m all too used to seeing. She’s disappointed. As she should be. I’ve disappointed this woman in every way that matters.
