I opened the door to find a beauty in a dark-purple dress standing in front of me, cradling a bottle of wine as she bent down and greeted my pig.
“Ciao bella,” I said, welcoming her inside.
She blushed softly and glanced down at her feet, removing her shoes.“Long time, no see.”
“Si.Da quanto tempo.”
Her head cocked to the side in cute confusion.
Nodding, I accepted the bottle she offered.“I am simply agreeing with you.I said, ‘since how long.’Same thing.”
“Ah.I, uh, I brought a merlot from our best year.It’s well-aged.Earthy.It’s one of my favorites, one of our best sellers, and the most expensive we sell.”She followed me into the kitchen.
“I will decant it,si?”
“Yes, I would.”
I brought down my aerator and decanter from my kitchen cabinet and tipped my head toward the drawer behind her hip.“Corkscrew is there.”Then I pointed to the flowers on the far side of my island.“And those tulips are for you.Garish and whorish, I know.I’m sorry.”
Laughing, she opened the drawer and pulled out the corkscrew.“My favorite kind of flowers.Thank you.”
“Prego.”
“So, besides witnessing two single moms who are clearly raising heathens go up against a godly, perfect family like the Pickfords, how was the rest of your day?”
Our fingers brushed as I accepted the corkscrew from her, and a little spark snapped when we touched.“I arrived home from the grocery store this morning to find several people wandering around my property with their children.”
“Huh?Who?”
I lifted a shoulder.“No idea.Five young women, twenties and thirties.Two men, and many small children.Some of them were without shoes or shirts.They tried to get into the barn, but it was locked.Were feeding the animals over the fence and went to the duck pond.”
“They just … showed up and started hanging out like it’s some petting farm?”
Nodding, I deployed the cork, then proceeded to pour the entire bottle through the aerator into the crystal decanter.“I have ordered several security cameras now.The children were unruly.Tormented Portia.”
Portia grunted in agreement from her princess bed.
“Then they tried to enter my home through the dog door.”
“The kids did?”Her eyebrows shot to her hairline.
“I stopped them.”
“What did the people look like?”
I gave her a side-eye as I brought two stemless wineglasses down from the cabinet.“If I say ‘dirty island hippies,’ will you be offended?”
She burst out laughing, and it was like music to my ears.“Of course not.Not everyone who lives on the island is a dirty hippie.But we certainlyhavethem here.”
“Well, I had to nip it in the butt.Because if you let themshenanonce, they will shenanigan, and I can’t risk my animals getting hurt.Or them hurting a child.”
She grinned widely at me.“Did you say ‘nip it in the butt’?”
“Si.Is that not what it is?”
“No, it’s ‘bud.’Like nipping flower buds to encourage growth to other flowers, or the plant to channel its energy into growing bigger rather than producing fruit.”
“Oh.I never knew that.I thought it was like biting a butt to get someone to stop something.”
