“Do I find Tom handsome?Yes.He’s very nice-looking.He’s also very kind and compassionate, and I’m grateful to him for allowing you to come spend time with the animals.Do Ilikehim?I don’t know, honey.I haven’t known him very long.”
“Do you think youcouldlike him?”
“Where’s this coming from?”I grabbed a granola bar from the cupboard for her, and some grapes from the fridge.Then I poured myself a glass of water and stood there, hip cocked against the counter, and drank my water, washing away the wine-infused thoughts of earlier.
She shrugged as she slathered some mint and yogurt sauce onto the wrap, then laid the thinly sliced tofu pieces on top.“I dunno.I mean, Aunt Gabrielle and Aunt Raina seem so happy now that they’re in happy relationships.Maybe it’s your turn?And Tom is so nice.And he has horses.If you two dated, I could spend more time there.”
That made me laugh.“Ah, so this quest to match me and Tom is purely for selfish reasons then?You just want more time with the animals?”
“Notpurelyselfish.Maybe a little selfish.But you deserve to be happy and find love too.Have youeverbeen on a date?”
“Do you want me to cut up some cucumbers for you?”I asked, deflecting.
She shook her head.“I have the cucumber and tomato mixture for the wrap.Can you answer me?”
“Can you act your age and not like a sixteen-year-old?”
She rolled her eyes.
“No,” I finally said, sighing.“I’ve never been on a date.I’ve been a little busy raising a fabulous daughter as a single mom and helping my cousins run the winery.I haven’t had much time to date.I’ll date when you’re eighteen.”
“And you’ll be old.”
“Excuse me?”
“Er.You’ll be old-er.”
“Forty is the new thirty, I’ve been told.I’ll be fine.”
“You and Tom seem to have gotten to know each other better though.Do you think you couldlikehim?If he called you up right now and asked you on a date, would you say yes?”
“I would say, ‘Samantha Jean St.Claire, it is time to finish making your lunch, do your reading, and get to bed.’”
“I think he’d be super confused if you said that to him when he asked you out for dinner.”She rolled up her shawarma wrap, put it in a container, then in her lunch kit and stowed it all in the fridge.I was already wiping up her mess on the counter.
“To bed,” I said, pointing toward the hallway and the bedrooms.
She turned serious.“What am I supposed to do about Clyde tomorrow?”
“Avoid him like he has the measles and I was stupid and didn’t vaccinate you.Which I totally did, but you know what I mean.I’m going to reach out to his parents and try to reason with them.This has got to stop.He’s targeting you now, and I want to know why.”
“Because I’m a freak.”
Setting my water glass down on the counter, I went to my daughter where she stood at the entrance to the hallway.“You’re not a freak.You have anxiety.That doesn’t mean you’re a freak.You reacted to his taunting.He pushed you.Anybody—even someone without anxiety—would eventually snap if they were pushing the way Clyde pushed you.Even Lotus McCreary, the yogi, and she’s as Zen as they come.”
My kid cracked a lopsided smile, but it fell a second later.“Francesca said she’s worried her dad’s going to die while she’s at school.That her mom died the day after they adopted her.She said that’s whyshehas anxiety.”
“And do you think she’s a freak?”
She shook her head.“No.I think it’s probably really scary to feel the way she does all the time.Always worried.I mean, you’re my only parent, and I obviously don’t want anything to happen to you, but I also know I have lots of other family around.I couldn’t imagine living every day with a fear like that.”
“It’d be pretty exhausting.”
Sam nodded.“I told her some of the stuff that Clyde’s done to me.She knows him and says he’s a jerk.We’re going to hang out tomorrow at recess.”
Running my hand down the back of her head, I hauled her into my arms.“You are not a freak.Francesca is not a freak.The only freak, in my opinion, is Clyde Whalley.He lacks empathy.He lacks a moral compass, and he lacks any kind of parental guidance.He’s the type of kid who will grow into one scary adult.The kind of adult who has a closet full of dolls with human hair.”
Sam pulled away from me, horror in her eyes.“What?”
