“My queen,” Avnas said, “as your bedoffistudiocation assistant, perhaps you will allow me to speak to the Reed on your behalf.”
“Yes. Explain it to her.”
Avnas took a few steps forward, tipped his bull head up, and met my gaze. “She did no such thing,” he said solemnly.
“There were hoof prints at the scene of the crime. Hooves I believe will match Xtelle’s. There were also prints left by a bull. A miniature bull. The prints were fresh. What were they, Than?”
“Fresh.”
“Fresh. And we drove right over here. Only to find mud on Xtelle’s hooves, mud on your hooves, and the exact plants which were stolen on display in this room. Unless you have some proof someone else did this, I’d say this case is open and shut. You are both going to be charged with trespassing and destruction of property, which carries a monetary fine, jail time, or both.”
“You would dare lock up this magnificence?” Xtelle demanded.
“It was I,” Avnas interrupted. Then, in a voice meant for stage, “I gathered unto my breast, the most precious shrubs, flowers of great beauty, and fragile blossoms to bestow upon my one true love. Even so, these rare plants fade to ash under the sunlight of my queen’s beauty.”
Xtelle made a little gasping sound.
“If I am to be jailed for love,” he went on, “so be it. If I am to be pierced by debt, shackled, degraded for my devotion, then I offer my flesh, my muscle, my bone to your cruel mortal punishment.”
He stretched one leg out and bowed over it, his head and horns sweeping downward.
“Bravo,” Xtelle called, clapping her little front hooves together. “Oh, bravo!”
“No,” I said over her, “not bravo. You just admitted to committing a crime, Avnas. This is serious. This is the kind of thing I can throw you out of Ordinary for.”
He straightened from his bow. “I understand. Perhaps a bribe is in order then?”
“No.” I rubbed at my forehead. “Bribery is another crime, Avnas. You’re just digging yourself in deeper here.”
“Huh. Well, I’ve admitted to the crime. Now how shall we proceed? Perhaps I will simply tip you a few hundred dollars to look the other way? Wink. Wink.”
“Still a crime. Why did you take the plants?”
“I don’t understand the question.”
“Why did you steal these plants from the Heritage Garden?”
“Pardon?”
“Let me give it a try,” Xtelle said, pushing forward. “Speak cleeer-ly, Deeee-laney.”
“All right, if you won’t talk to me here, I’ll just take you both to jail and lock you up.”
“The boring jail?” Xtelle asked through pursed lips.
“No. The magic jail. Which will hold you both. You might remember it, Avnas, since I’ve already locked you up there once.”
“Perhaps you should also be reminded,” Than said, “that there are only three chances one may have to ‘misunderstand’ the laws of Ordinary. And then one will be banished for all time.”
Xtelle and Avnas both stilled. Then they looked at each other. I didn’t know if they could speak telepathically, but it was possible since they both nodded and looked back at me in tandem.
“We would not speak of this in other circumstances,” Avnas said. “You must understand our discretion is of the highest caliber.”
“All right.”
“The plants are for…the main event.”
I shook my head. “That doesn’t mean anything to me.”
