Page 46 of No Longer Innocent


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Ivan

You should be dancing around that beautiful ballroom too. A woman who looks like you should never be alone, outside, looking sad. You should be wooed.

What did someone say to that? This wasn’t some typical arrangement, but I couldn’t exactly out myself on that one either. I took a deep breath, shoved my phone back into my clutch, and marched back into the ballroom. I had a show to put on. Jane’s life and innocence depended on it.

Chapter Thirty

Poppy

The goodnight kissDonovan pressed to my lips in the same place we’d shared our first didn’t make my toes curl. It didn’t make me want to grab his suit and haul him up against me. In fact, it was wet, sloppy, and tasted too much like whiskey. There was also a faint smell of a floral perfume on his coat that caused the hairs on the back of my neck to stand on end.

When he pulled away from me, he swayed slightly on his feet but grinned like he’d won something grand. All it did was make me sick, but I smiled all the same because I could hear cameras clicking off in the distance, and this was a show.

When he finally turned to climb into the waiting car, I took a half step back, resisting the urge to wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. His driver gave me a polite nod before closing the door behind him, and just like that,Donovan Madden was gone—off to whatever afterparty or conquest came next.

The cameras kept flashing for another few seconds, hoping I’d chase after him, but I didn’t. I just stood there under the awning, my face frozen in that same sweet smile I’d been wearing all night until my cheeks burned. When the lights finally dimmed and the reporters moved on, I let it fall.

God, I was tired of pretending.

I wrapped my arms around myself as the wind whipped through the street. I looked both ways as people milled around me; some even cussed at me.

I could take Jane and we could run away. But I knew better. There was no place I could hide myself or my sister that either Donovan Madden or my brothers wouldn’t find us.

Maybe. A treacherous voice entered my mind.Maybe you could slowly take money out of your account until you have enough to really hide.

They would still find us. They would spend a small fortune to make us pay. My shoulders slumped as I entered my building. The doorman tipped his hat at me. “You look beautiful tonight, Mrs. Fairchild.”

“Thank you,” I whispered as my eyes filled with tears and I turned toward the private elevator. When the doors dinged open, Ivan was standing there waiting for me.

I knew without a shadow of a doubt that he’d been watching based on how his eyes were dark and molten.

“You going somewhere?” I knew the answer, but I asked the question anyway. I was his purpose at that moment.

He shook his head. “Just picking up some food.”

I frowned as he got out of the elevator, and I got in. He looked over his shoulder at me. “Hold the door, ‘kay?”

The doors started to close again before he reappeared, a brown paper bag in one hand and a takeout cup in the other. He nodded once in thanks as he stepped in beside me. The scent of garlic and something fried filled the small space, cutting through the faint perfume and champagne that clung to me from the gala.

“Hungry?” I asked, though my voice came out softer than I intended.

“Starving,” he said. His tone was flat, but I could see the muscle in his jaw ticking. He wasn’t just talking aboutfood.

The elevator hummed quietly as it started its climb. I watched the floor numbers tick up, pretending I wasn’t aware of every inch of space between us. The soft crinkle of the takeout bag, the low rhythm of his breathing—it was all too much and too close.

“You don’t have to pretend with me.” The words were barely a whisper. I almost missed them.

“If I start crying now, I won’t be able to stop,” I shrugged, and let out a little laugh to keep the tone light—as if I was lying, and I didn’t really need to cry so desperately.

With a soft thud, I kicked off my heels in the entryway. I didn’t care if the buckles were destroyed or if they even survived the night. All I cared about was comfort.

I marched to my room with determination to tear the dress from my body, but as soon as the thought entered my mind, all I could picture was Ivan ripping it down my backand peeling the shimmering fabric from my skin. He would replace the sparkles with his lips…

I shook my head. I couldn’t go there. I couldn’t risk it. Because the moment I started envisioning these things… It was the moment I began making plans, and there was no future for Ivan and I. All there could be was heartbreak if I continued down that path, and I couldn’t handle any more of that in my life.

With a hard tug, I yanked an almost too small sweatshirt over my head and some little shorts over my legs. Fuzzy socks were next, and I didn’t even bother with taking my makeup off. All I could think about was food and maybe a movie to fall asleep to.

The good thing about a private chef was that there were tons of meals prepared for me already… The bad thing was that I had no idea what had been prepared for me, and if I would deem it edible for tonight. My stomach growled again, forcing me into motion. My stomach didn’t care what was in the fridge as long as it got fed.