HOLLY
As sunlight streams through my window, my eyes flutter open. Picture-perfect snowflakes fall outside, covering the tall pines in light layers of fluffy white snow.
Next to me, Felix is still sound asleep. Even his snakes haven’t began to stir, resting peacefully atop his head.
It’s the most perfect Christmas morning I have ever experienced.
How can one person make me feel so loved, so seen, so understood…so quickly? What did I do to deserve it?
The universe is rewarding me, yet I don’t know why. All I’ve been for the past many, many years is horrible.
A total cynic.
Completely and utterly selfish and horrible.
Felix stirs next to me, and he rolls over, his arm slipping over my waist and pulling me to him, my back to his chest. Warmth radiates from him, and his snakes move silently—I can feel them tucking away into my hair.
He’s half asleep as he mumbles, “It’s too early to be awake…”
Snuggling into him, I softly say, “Then go back to sleep.”
There’s an incoherent groan from him, his chest rising and falling heavily against my back. His snakes have settled, a welcome new presence.
Granted, having snakes in your hair definitely takes some getting used to. They’ve done this since the first time he stayed over, though—when he’s lying close enough.
His snakes, I’ve learned, are an extension of him. While they seemingly act on their own, a lot of it is his subconscious sneaking through, through them.
It’s just another one of his many charming features. Even his damned puns don’t annoy me anymore.
My eyelids feel heavy again, and I watch the snow fall until I can’t keep my eyes open anymore. Lying there in his arms, about to sleep in for the first time in years…it feels right.
Everything I thought I was doing right in life, I was doing wrong.
Well, noteverything—but love, definitely wrong.
Heartbreak shouldn’t define you, yet I let it.
Now, though, I’m ready to love and be loved, and rather than let it define me, I want to let it guide me.
After Felix left on Christmas to go back to his place, I had an epiphany.
I need to right my wrongs. First, I need to make some apology donations to a few charities. Yes, Christmas has passed, but most of them run year-round.
The ones that don’t, I’m sure will accept an early donation. If they don’t, well, I’ll make it upnextChristmas.
While I’m not going to track down every person I yelled at, chewed out, or slammed a door in the face of…I won’t do any of that again.
Unless they really,reallyannoy me. But that doesn’t have to be holiday specific. Like that man at the tree plot? He was an asshole.
Then there’s my wonderful love Felix. Man, I must’ve been a major pain in the ass—one he endured, but still.
I want to make it up to him, and I have theperfectidea.
One he won’t see coming, but oh, ho, ho, will he ever be coming.
CHAPTER 16
FELIX
