“I’m saying—” he closed the distance between us completely, his tone dropping to a caress of a whisper—“I miss you. And I don’t think I can bear not having you in my arms for one more day. Believe me, I tried to stay away…” he sighed, shaking his head, “…I really did. But you know who you are, Sanora. It’s impossible.”
I couldn’t stop the tear that slipped free as my voice shook. “Who am I?”
He stared into my eyes for a long moment before the words began to pour out of him with ease, like he didn’t need to think about it. “My damnation. My downfall. My delirium. My obsession. My abyss. My torment. My hunger. My ruin. My weakness. My destruction. My undoing. My light…” his eyes blazed like fire, “…mine. You’re mine.”
Why did he know so many words? My throat closed, and I bit my bottom lip hard to keep it from trembling as his face blurred through my tears.
He kept going. “If you still need space, I don’t think I can—”
I rushed into him, my arms locking around his torso.
It took him a second, but when his hands came around me, they were tight and crushing, enveloping me in the scent and warmth I’d missed so badly.
“Fuck, Sanora.” He buried his face in my hair. “I missed thissomuch.”
I wanted to tell him I missed it too, but no words would form. The only thing I could do was cry.
I cried into his chest, all the tears I’d been hoarding bursting out of me.
I didn’t know what it was about his presence that always tore me open. Seeing him always made me want to burst into tears—either from too much joy, or from the jagged mix of feelings that came with hugging him like he was life itself. I was sad and happy at once. Sad that his curse could only be broken in the cruellest way imaginable, and that he had gone through the worst shit in the past. Happy because he was right here, and I was seeing him again.
I refused to let him go, so he walked us inside the house and closed the door with one arm still around me. We held each other for long minutes until the tears slowed and I felt drained of everything that had been choking me for days.
Then Thrax shifted, his hands sliding to my shoulders, pushing me back gently. One hand came up to my chin, tilting my head up.
“Look at me,” he said softly.
“I am—”
“No.” He leaned in. “Look like you remember who you belong to.”
That made me meet his dark eyes. They roamed over my face with an obsession no one else could match, and I realised—no one could appreciate me in a single stare the way Thrax did.
“I want you to know something for sure,” he murmured, peeling his leather gloves from his hands and letting them fall to the floor.
“What is that?” My voice was small.
He cupped my face in his bare palms, warmth spreading across my cheeks. “I don’t care. Let the moon curse me. Let eternity bleed me dry. I don’t care if your soul saves me or damns me. You are mine, Sanora, and I will go on wanting you until the stars themselves collapse.” He tucked my hair behind my ear. “Remember that. Always.”
There goes my heart and tear ducts again.
I’d said it before, but Thrax really knew how to say the best things. And I wondered if he’d spent his years perfecting it the same way he’d learnt and perfected everything else, or maybe it was just very natural for him.
I nodded, filing those words to the space closest to my heart. “I want to hear it.”
“Hear what?”
I bit my lip, hesitating. “What you wrote in the letter. Can I hear it in person? You said you love her…and the depth of it terrifies you.” I held his gaze, holding my breath. “Tell me.”
Winifred’s voice telling me Thrax didn’t love me was still too loud in my head. I needed him—his voice—to drown it out. Even if I already knew, I needed tohearhim say it.
“I love you.” He nodded once, sure. “I love you,Nher. Love you so much it’s too much for my heart. I’ve never been so certain of anything in my life.”
Tears welled up in my eyes. I didn’t know why I thought I could handle hearing the Soulless Man tell me he loved me. Because suddenly, I couldn’t speak. My lips felt paralysed, and if I forced them apart, I might just break again.
“I know, Sanora. I know how you feel.” He placed his hand over his heart. “I can feel everything right here.” Bringing it back up, he caught a tear on his thumb. “Now, let’s go home.”
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
