“Colt—”
“Okay,” I repeat before she can go on another rant. “I’m hurt—of course I am. I…I don’t understand if she felt that way…why keep me?” I shake my head, sigh. “It’s a mess and I know I’m going to need help figuring this shit out, but…”
“What?” she asks when I don’t go on.
“But it’s almost a relief, I guess.”
Her eyes go wide.
“I finally know the truth of why she hates me, and I guess some part of me even understands it.” I sigh, smooth back her hair. “So, yeah, I know healing from this isn’t going to be smooth sailing, but…do I want Blake to live with us—yes, us? Absolutely. Do I want you to move in with me? Also, absolutely. Do I want to build a life where we’re happy, so damned happy I don’t think of what was missing from the woman who was supposed to love me? Yes, of course I do.”
She sniffs. “I want that too.”
“Good.” I smile. “Because I want babies with your eyes and to help you grade papers and decorate your classroom. I want to find a way to get Holly fired and see Adrian graduate from high school and kick ass in life. I want you, Teach, forever and always. Not just because you’re smart and beautiful and mine but because you see me and you love me, and you show me that.”
“Colt,” she whispers, tears slipping from the corners of her eyes.
“I knew I wanted you from that first smile, knew I would find a way to make the shadows in your eyes disappear. I knew I had to make sure you were no longer scared when I was near. Because I knew I needed you in my life forever.” I kiss away her tears. “But I didn’t know it could be like this, could be more, that you—only you, starfire—could make my pain go away. Ever since I was a kid I had to find a way to just be okay, to bury the hurt, to put one foot in front of the other and move on. But you”—I cup her jaw—“you love me.”
“I do,” she says, her hand settling over my chest.
“And you don’t care if I’m not okay—” Frowning, she opens her mouth, but I gently place a finger over her lips, pausing her rebuttal of those words. “You love me—okay or not, happy or sad or indifferent, hockey player or teacher’s assistant or newly crowned reality TV buff.”
“I do,” she says again. “Because you’re that for me too.”
“I know.” I touch her cheek. “Because you taught me that’s what love should be.”
A soft smile. “You’re going to make me cry again.”
“That’s okay. I’ll hold you until you’re done then kiss your tears away all over again.”
She sniffs.
I tug her close, hold her tight.
“I just have one question,” she says long, long minutes later when we’ve finally managed to pull apart.
I take her hand, draw her back to the hospital, back to my brother, back to make arrangements that are going to change all of our lives…and do it for the better.
“What’s that?” I ask, as we reach the entrance.
Her smile seals the wound inside me a few more millimeters.
Her mischievous question a couple more.
“Who’s changing the tire?”
Epilogue
Ky, A Few Months Later, Right at the Trade Deadline
I stare at my brother. “You’re kidding me.”
He sighs, reclining back on the couch. “It was a trade I had to make. You know it.”
Dread curls in my stomach and I stare down at my hands.
“I guess you’re right. I just…”
