In the meantime, the morning could wait, because Kell was there as everyone went in their own directions, and they were the only two standing in the light of the mess tent.
Was anyone spying on them? But as Kell came up to him and slipped his arms around Marston’s waist, he really didn’t give a damn. Everybody in the valley could watch as he bent to kiss Kell, and to savor that moment, the warm connection between them, soft and slow, as a trio of bats flitted in and out of the light on silent, black-edged shadowy wings.
“Maybe we could go to my tent?” he asked.
“Yes, please,” said Kell, on his toes for another kiss, sweet and soft and quick.
Marston guided them to his tent, the third one along, the auto-lights going off behind them, leaving them in total darkness, save the glow of the two other team lead tents they passed, clean, dark outlines of the duos within so easily seen. Low voices. A bit of a laugh, teasing.
“Here we are,” said Marston.
He led the way up onto the wooden platform and unzipped the tent. Stepping inside, he pulled the chain for the light and cast his gaze around to make sure everything was put to rights.
Everything was fine, though the quiet nighttime air inside the tent seemed much less dramatic and romantic than the stargazing while sitting on the tailgate of a two-lane blacktop road. That is, until Kell eased beneath Marston’s arm and wrapped himself around Marston like a warm starfish, temple pressed to Marston’s chest, an excited tremor seeming to make him shake.
“You okay?” asked Marston. He drew his hand along Kell’s head, fingers carding through his dark hair, then along his neck, and then long strokes to his back. “Nothing’s going to happen that you don’t want.” He paused, thinking to add that they might just sleep next to each other, this first time, ease in slowly.
“This is you courting me, right?” asked Kell, a quick, impish smile on his face.
“Yes,” said Marston, feeling quite sure, more sure than anything else in his life.
“But you’ll fuck me someday, right?” asked Kell, a soundless, open-mouthed laugh taking the sting out of the words, the harshness.
The idea of it made Marston’s heart speed up, almost painfully, a hard feeling, but a good one that sent hot shocks through his thighs.
“Yes,” he said. “But tonight I thought we’d sleep—” He paused, his face feeling a sear of heat for wanting something so—so fucking domestic and sweet. “That we’d just hold each other.”
He was on the verge of saying it out loud, that he’d never slept with another human being, not since he’d slept on that mattress on the floor with his brother and sister, not since social services had come and scattered their wreck of a family to the four winds.
“You’d like that?” asked Kell, and now the laughter was gone. In its place was a tender green-eyed gaze, a soft arm looped around his neck, pulling him down for a soft, soft, soft kiss to his cheek.
“I’ve never just slept—” he began, but stopped trying to talk when Kell cupped his fingers around Marston’s jaw. “Never just slept with anyone.”
“I have,” said Kell. “But not like this, so it’s still a first for me. I’m good with any of it as long as it’s with you.”
Wordlessly, Marston nodded, then dipped for another kiss, the simple connection of their bodies sweet and tender, featherlight, like the brush of a bat’s wing.
“I’ll help you undress,” he said. “And you can help me.”
There was magic, and then there was this. This moment, forever emblazoned on Marston’s brain, carved in his heart, remaking him from the inside out. The way Kell sat on Marston’s cot, just about at ease, his eyes a little wide.
Then he smiled as he reached for his top button, paused, and then bent to untie his boots. Midway through, he patted the cot beside him and Marston realized he was, quite simply, staring. As if he’d never seen anyone take off their boots before.
“Let me—” he said, now, once again leaving off the rest of what he wanted to say, as if all the oxygen had been ripped out of his lungs. “I’ll zip us in, so we don’t get eaten by mosquitos.”
This he did. Then he sat next to Kell and together they got undressed.
After Marston had pulled the chain on the light and cast the tent in darkness, they clambered into the single cot together, giggling low as they arranged themselves, Marston on his back, Kell in his arms.
“I’ll get more pillows,” said Marston, trailing his thumb along Kell’s arm. “Amazon delivers, you see.”
“You’re my pillow,” said Kell with a nuzzle along Marston’s neck. “You’re all I need. All I’ll ever need.”
That wasn’t quite true, because surely in his life Kell would need more than just Marston. Or maybe Marston was just thinking dark thoughts because that’s what he was used to. Maybe with Kell in his life, the future would be brighter, enough to chase the shadows away, enough to feel the sun on his face and not imagine it was going to be ripped away.
“Sleep well,” he said with a quick kiss to the top of Kell’s head, savoring the relaxed sleepy feel of Kell’s legs alongside his. The slow rise and fall of Kell’s bare chest against his side. Kell’s scent filling his lungs, the odd, dense feeling of falling as he fell asleep so fast, he was almost spinning into it.
This, then, was how it felt to not be alone in the darkness. This was precious. This was true magic.
