More time would’ve just made it more painful, for him, at the very least. For Niamh and Truffél too, perhaps. Malek, even.
When he’d seen them all gathered, and his tenants, his friends, he’d nearly—
‘Thorn!’ And now he was so far gone he was hearing Hypatia’s voice. ‘Thorn Ackerman!’
So perhaps not a dream.
Lifting his sad head, he looked up, to find Hypatia riding at nigh-on full tilt towards him, and his heart skipped one too many beats—in excitement, hope, and also alarm—as he rose to his feet quickly.
Skidding to a stop, she slid off her horse whilst he watched with wide eyes, trying to make sense of her expression, to know what he should expect from this meeting.
‘Love doesn’t feel like whisky,’ she told him fiercely, without preamble, letting her horse’s reins fall, and marching towards him until she was before him again, within reach, not that he dared.Not yet, though I find myself hoping considering the word love just left her lips.‘It feels like nothing at all, for there is no comparison. My love for you, it is settled, and invisible, and lives with me like the lightest cloak of protection and warmth ever created,’ she told him, softer, catching her breath.
Thorn’s eyes filled with tears, and he hoped, even as he knew, her loving him, it couldn’t change anything, no matter how much he wanted it to.
I still have to go.
And perhaps she saw that, for she shook her head, and stood straighter.
‘My love for you is vibrant, and steadying, and soothing. Ever-present, yet non-intrusive, and it supports my every thought, my every fibre, without ever demanding anything in return. I don’t need you, Thorn,’ she smiled, and her candour, the truth he heard but couldn’t yet see, made him smile too,renewing his hope. ‘I can live, and breathe, and walk, and speak, and eat, and dress, and go on without you. But if you leave, I won’t be able to do any of it without pain, ever. Perhaps I could find happiness in time without you, perhaps I could find another version of freedom I’ve never experienced, but I don’t want to. You were the first true risk I ever took, and if you are the only one I ever do, that will be enough for me. And this isn’t a decision I take lightly. I need you, to live the life I wish to, to be the Hypatia I wish to. To dream as I wish to. And right now, I dream ofthislife. I dream of being a pig farmer, and seeing our house thrive, and learning more about pigs and crops and horses and roofs and drainage systems. They aregooddreams. Exceptional dreams. And I dream of doing it all with you. Of coming to London with you, to be Countess of Gadmin. I will. I am your wife, and it is my choice. And we might be miserable, and we might struggle, but we will do so together. Someday, that may change, and I know if that day were ever to come, you would let me go. But in the meantime, you won’t be rid of me so easily. Because I do need you, in ways I shouldn’t, but that I allow myself to because life is better with you by my side. So I choose to need you, and that better be enough for you, because I’m not going back to live without you.’
‘As you command, my lady,’ he managed to choke out, tears streaming down his face, stopped only by the wrinkles in his cheeks from his broadest smile.
‘Quite so. It’s back to Gadmin Hall for us, so we canproperlyprepare for this new chapter, but not until after our celebratory party for Belinda and Clyde. I hope those rooms you secured are big enough for the two of us.’
‘Afraid not,’ he chuckled wetly, finally,finallydaring to touch her, to ensure she was real. ‘I’ll have him find new ones, and advise of the changes.’
‘Good.’
‘Good.’
‘Thorn?’
‘Yes, Hypatia?’
‘Time to kiss me now.’
‘Very well, my lady.’
And so he did as he was commanded by his love, and his heart, and every fibre of his being, and he sealed this new deal, as he’d sealed the first with this woman.
It was the truest, most honest and messy kiss of their time thus far; full of love, and tears, and newness, and hope. Perhaps someday, he would tire of learning all the ways to love this woman, and be loved by her, but he doubted it. Just as he doubted that they would have anything short of an extraordinary, amusing, and joyful life.
Met on a Wednesday,
Married on a Friday,
Met again on a Wednesday,
Fell in love every Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday,
Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday since,
Still tried to leave on a Tuesday,
But found my home, my purpose, my heart again,
So not another day shall pass in this life
