Stealing my nerves, I took a sip of Cerberus’s old fashioned and sighed. “Well, shit. Your dog makes a better drink than you, Lucifer.”
The devil’s eyes blazed with hellfire, burning me up from the inside out. “I should spank you for that, Ms. Sims.”
My pussy clenched at his threat, and both sets of my cheeks flushed at the wicked thought. “I’m ready for the memory.”
Chapter Eighteen
Lucifer
Lust – Past
Isat at the top of the half-finished tower, gazing into the dark mask of oblivion. Rain hailed down on the tarp covering the construction site and ravaged the ropes that held it, threatening to rip it away in the storm. As an immortal, I could work forever without dying, so it was easy to carry on, erecting my vision, dad after day without a break. And without a moon or a sun, it was easy to lose track of time. I could only guess how long Lilith and I had spent here, building my vision of a better Second Circle.
I had a complicated relationship with blessings, but that woman was no short of a miracle, a hellish miracle born of hellfire and chaos. She didn’t have to stick with me through any of this, but she did. All I had was my big dreams, and she just smiled and went along with them, ready to help build whatever crazy thing it was I could imagine. Dreaming right along with me.
We’d been through Hell together, and no layer of Abbadon’s Hell had been particularly kind, but the Third Circle had been brutal, the trails there nearly severing our journey short.
I could only begin to guess how long we’d spent there, plucking out the poor corpses of the gluttonous Abaddon had stuck in that damned mire. The blood curling, agonizing screams of their suffering still haunted me and the putrid stench of their own filth they’d been forced to wallow in still clung to my nostrils. There wasn’t any part of our trip that had been kind.
At any time, Lilith could have left.
She could have gone back to Abaddon.
She could have gone anywhere. But she was still here, here with me. She was helping me rebuild Hell, no matter how much sweat and blood and tears it cost us.
Lust had been a relief compared to the rest of the demented circus the archdemon had been running. The Second Circle was nothing more than an endless stretch of wasteland, seeped in ceaseless night and ravaged by constant storms. The rain was unforgiving compared to the surface; it stung at the skin like a thousand whips lashing your body if you didn’t wear anything to protect yourself. But hey, that was better than mires filled with feces and moaning gluttons, rivers of corpses, and the dozen other horrors we’d weathered. Compared to all that, the manual labor spent in Lust’s wastes building my true paradise was practically a vacation.
My muscles were aching, my beast grumbling and moaning with pent-up frustration as he always did when Lilith was near, and my hands were calloused, but my heart was content. Content for the first time ever.
“Are you hungry?” a familiar voice called. I turned to see silvery eyes peering over the platform, small hands gripping the construction ladder. “I made some soup.” Lilith pulled herself up the tower ladder, a clay jar stuffed down the front of her tunic to free her hands. The smells rolling off of her were a mix of savory broth and the sweet yet warm scent of sunshine. My stomach growled for the soup while my beast growled for her. Suppressing him was becoming increasingly difficult. He lusted for her ever since the River Styx. Ever since… No, I had to suppress the memory. Thinking about what had happened that day would only encourage him. If it wasn’t for my lack of wings keeping him in, I would have surely lost control of him a few floors back.
Lilith wasn’t the kind of woman who would submit to a mate. It was why her and Abaddon’s frayed relationship was so explosive. They were both alphas.
In any case, I had a mate. Eve. I had to keep telling myself that this was all for Eve.Eve.I repeated the name in my head like a damn chant. But each time I said her name, it carried less meaning.
My beast resonated with Lilith, naming her my true mate. That had to be a mistake, one made out of desperation. She was the only constant companion I’d had since coming here. She was beautiful and fierce. Her shape was perfect, her curves soft and delicate amongst a landscape of jagged stone and ugly creatures to call it home. Her scent was a breath of fresh air in a cesspit filled with filth and squalor. Her wit was sharp amongst bubbling, fading souls, and her eyes were kind when everything else here was cruel.
How could I not desire her? After everything we’d been through together, we were close. The line between friendship had blurred.
My beast was confused.
Keep telling yourself that. It won’t make it true,he snarled in the back of my head.
It was becoming harder to ignore him. My resolve was crumbling, especially since I knew her beast resonated with my own. But no matter how much I longed for her, she wasn’t mine to claim.
“I’m ravenous,” I told her through a stiff smile, gesturing for her to take a seat beside me. She crawled up on the rickety construction platform, her storm-gray eyes completely devoid of fear. I wasn’t even sure the demoness knew the meaning of the word.
The oil lantern lit beside me wrapped her features in the golden glow of its flickering flame, her skin covered in a sheen of rain.
“You’re drenched.” I frowned at the way she shivered in her soaking tunic, the fabric clinging to her skin. My eyes dipped to where her nipples peaked against the shirt, their rosy hue dark against the almost translucent cotton.
I swallowed thickly, forcing my gaze away.
Mine.My beast clawed at my insides, screaming that word in my ear.
I tamped down on ancient instincts, turning my focus on the hot jug of broth she clung to. I reached over and uncorked the jug, guiding it to her lips. “Drink so that it will warm you. How did you get so drenched? I thought you were back at camp.”
“I was,” she said through chattering teeth. “But the tarp cover had been ripped away in the storm. It put out the fire I was using for our meal, but it finished just in time. Not that the weed that grows here improves after cooking.”
