“Only when you fall asleep while it’s playing on the TV.”
“I cannot help that it is one of the few afternoon programs that soothes the beast within your sister’s soul.”
“Yeah, yeah, keep telling yourself that.”
“Impudent boy.” She gave his cheek the tiniest pinch, then gathered Veronica in her arms.
I watched the whole thing unfold, not quite an outsider but not an insider either. I was locked in the peripheral, waiting for permission to come closer, and all I could think of was that the scene was sobeautiful.
Family. They were a family forged together despite someone trying to destroy all of them. And although they had their struggles, their nightmares that refused to let go even against the hopeful rays of wakefulness, somehow, they’d found a way to make their own happiness. Their own pack.
I wanted in.
Suddenly, I wasn’t so sure I could be okay with Ben deciding he wasn’t ready for a relationship. I wouldn’t try to force one on him, or badger him, but at the same time, a beautiful picture was forming in my head, and I didn’t think I could let go of it.
I could see my dad and Benny watching long documentaries about some shared interest while I sat on the floor and read to Veronica. I could see Nox and Benny playing video games together.
I could see Simon and Ben going fishing together, although Ben had never mentioned an interest in such a thing. I could even see Natalie and I shopping together, Ben watching the kids.
All of it flashed before my eyes in a beautiful procession, and it nearly took my breath away.
I was incredibly grateful everyone was busy packing up and heading out, because it gave me the chance to recover. But there was only so much recovery I could do. I was pretty sure I was falling in love. It had gone beyond attraction, beyond casual for me.
But how didBenfeel?
Because as much as I wanted us to be on the same page, he had lost a wife, a soulmate. There was no way I could ever fully understand. I’d had one serious relationship in my life, and it had ended on relatively good terms.
If he wasn’t ready, he just wasn’t ready, and there was no way I could pressure him to be.
Even if I desperately wanted him to want me.
Fuck, I’d really gotten myself into a bit of a pickle, hadn’t I?
Well, I had about another ten minutes to get myself out of the emotional funk, otherwise Ben would definitely smell it on me once he came back from loading up the kids and saying goodbye.
There was a bit of a learning curve when it came to dating a shifter, but thanks to the group of “allies”—as they called themselves—I’d hung out with earlier, I’d learned an awful lot.
Mrs. Hayashi had wanted to show me around a bit, but her ultimate goal was to drop me off with the small circle of humans who were sitting around and enjoying a couple of beers while their shifter partners played with the kids in their animal forms.
For a brief second, I’d thought that maybe we were purposefully segregated, but no, that didn’t seem to be the case. It was just a natural grouping of humans resting and socializing while the shifters did their thing.
And to be honest, I learned alotfrom that group. Tips for safety, both in everyday life and even sexually. I hadn’t had the heart to tell them that Ben and I weren’t at that level yet—not that it was any of their business.
I also learned little things I could do to cover for them in human society—not a ton, since Ben and his family already had a pretty good handle on it—but things could get dicey when puberty came, so me working at the same school Benny went to was a huge boon.
“Penny for your thoughts?” I’d gotten more used to how silently Ben could move, but he still startled me every now and then. “Whoa, sorry there. I didn’t mean to make you jump.”
“It’s okay,” I said, trying to focus on settling down my nerves the way the human partners had explained to me. I expected I would get better in time with more practice. “So, now that we’ve eaten our fill, and a lot of the youngsters are headed to bed, what’s next for this jamboree?”
“Really anything. The world is our oyster.”
“Oh, so we could rob a bank?”
“Okay, maybe notanything,” he said, chuckling slightly. It wasn’t a full laugh, but I would take it. “We could go on a bit of a walk, find a nice place to watch as the sun sets and the fireflies come out. We could socialize and go from cluster to cluster since people have kind of spread out from the main pavilion. Or we could just sit here and chat. Or...” he trailed off, and that piqued my interest. Maybe I had been a cat shifter in a past life, because boy, did I have curiosity to spare.
“Or what?” I asked, more than a bit intrigued.
“Or you could dance with us.”
