She swallowed hard. “Oh,” she quietly said, still feeling numb but certain that her pain, anger, and grief would sweep in soon enough.
“Exactly,” Ken said, firmly but not unkindly. “They tortured that family. They mean business. You cannot be put at risk. Once we have solid information, then we can move on it. Trevor’s amassing the troops over there. His people know the region far better than we do, which is not at all.”
A prickle of tears stung her eyes. She knew the eruption would happen shortly, and she’d likely find it impossible to function for at least a little while. “What do we do? About trying to find him?”
He knelt in front of her, still holding her hands and looking…seriously grim. “I don’t know,” he finally said. “I think we have to defer to Trevor unless or until we know otherwise.” He glanced at Trent. “I know there are some…things we need to deal with shortly,” he added. “Instructions. I refuse to engage in unrealistic, toxic positivity because we also have a pack to run and other potential threats to deal with.
“But Peyton’s a Prime. If they don’t know who they’re dealing with, he might already be free and on his way back. They abducted him in a remote area, and I suspect they took him somewhere equally remote. So please don’t count him out. Stay hopeful. I mean, look what happened with me and Nami. I know this isn’t the same, but if we could survive, Peyton has a massive advantage over us and a lot more experience handling himself than we did.”
Her vision blurred as she nodded and tried not to think about her angry words to him before he left. “Yeah.”
He squeezed her hands. “When we finish here, I need you to stay here while we talk to Dewi. Please, Gillian, promise us you won’t take any actions without consulting us first. Don’t call or text anyone, and damned sure don’t leave the house. Please? These are instructions Peyton passed to me to give to you.”
She blinked back tears, feeling the scream trying to claw its way free from her throat. She didn’t trust her voice and instead nodded.
“Please don’t tell anyone else, either,” Ken repeated, looking to Trent again.
“We don’t want anyone else to know yet,” Trent said. “If he gets free and contacts us, no one else needs to know besides us until he returns. But if others?—”
“I get it,” she gritted out, still struggling not to scream. “I’m not an idiot. We can’t look weak. The pack must have a strong Pack Alpha, or we’re vulnerable.”
Trent nodded.
“The Enforcers are coming over for dinner tonight,” she reminded them.
“We can cancel it,” Badger suggested.
“No,” Ken said, still meeting her gaze. “We can’t. Peyton’s orders to me.”
Her throat had dried up. When she tried to swallow, she heard the click it made. “And mine. Because we have to name the successor while they’re all here,” she whispered. When Ken nodded, the breath whooshed out of her again. “He suspected something might happen.” She looked up at them. “I bet that’s why he sent out the invites. He didn’t ask me before he did it, and for something like this, he normally would. It makes sense—everyone’s here from the inner circle, and a bunch of Enforcers.”
When the men exchanged a glance, she fought the urge to scream at them for being so dense. “We have to tell them! If it slips out—when it slips out—hiding it makes us look weak! I’m sure whatever his instructions are, he’ll name one of you or Dewi as acting Pack Alpha.”
Something pecked at the back of her mind, like an impending revelation, and she realized it was likely one of Peyton’s Prime commands to her about to fire off when the situation evolved to whatever point he’d deemed necessary to trigger it.
Badger softly cleared his throat. “Are ye sure ye don’t want me and Duncan to?—”
“Do not fucking Prime me!” Now her grief flashed to anger. “I’m the goddamned Pack Alpha’s wife, and I will deal with my emotions. If and only if I ask you, then yes, you can. Until then, do not ask me.”
“Sorry, lass,” Badger said, holding up his hands again. “Yer absolutely right.”
Ken urged her to her feet and slipped an arm around her to help her walk to the bedroom. “One of us will come let you know after we tell Dewi. Then the six of us will sit down and talk.”
She looked at him. “Six?”
“Me, you, Dewi, Duncan, Badger, and Trent.”
She stopped and turned, Ken still keeping an arm around her waist as she looked to the other three men. “Don’t you dare fucking lie to me or withhold information. Understand? I help run this pack, too.”
The three shifters solemnly nodded, and she finally let Ken guide her down the hallway.
With the bedroom door closed behind them, she sank onto the bed and looked up at him, now letting her tears freely flow. “I was so mad at him,” she whispered. “He called and left me messages, and texted me, and I didn’t answer.” A sob escaped. “I didn’t answer his calls.”
Ken knelt in front of her, taking her hands again, and it briefly pierced through her pain how perfect this man was for Dewi and how blessed they were as a family that the two of them met.
“He told me he knew you were upset,” Ken said. “And that he felt horrible about it. He knows you love him. I guarantee you he doesn’t hold it against you, because he feels guilty as fuck.”
“Do you think he’s still alive?” she asked. “Be honest.”
