His sweet, playful giggle warms my soul. “He said the best way to trigger your territorial pet mode would be to make you mark and claim me.”
“He’s sneaky.” He’s also one hundred percent correct.
“Yeah, he is.” He tips his head back to kiss me again. “Any second thoughts?”
“And thirds and fourths, but not about proposing.” I stare into his eyes in the dim light. Like this they appear dark green, forest shadows concealing a potential predator. “Only that the world isn’t further along so I can claim you, too.”
His soft sigh caresses my cheek. “Four more years, El. Then it doesn’t matter. I won’t fuck up your presidency. I willnotlet you do that. Not over me.”
“You’re worth it.”
“Not like this.” A stern hint creeps into his tone, Sir peeking through and making His presence known. “Promiseme, El. You propose to Leo, and then we’ll be careful as hell so I can keep working with you.”
“I know.” I feel like a sulky teenager saying it that way but there’s nothing to be done for it, I suppose.
It’s how the world works and how we have to go on.
But as I drift to sleep I find myself dreaming about a different world, a better one, where both my men can proudly walk beside me as my spouses without worrying what anyone thinks about it.
CHAPTERTHIRTY-SEVEN
As the week drags on,not spending my days counting the hours until I propose to Leo isn’t as difficult as you might think. Not when I’ve got a country to run.
And a family Thanksgiving dinner to plan.
I mean, technically. Jordan’s doing most of theactualplanning. And cooking.
A small part of me wants to break the news to Mom and Dad about Leo before I pop the question. Meanwhile, the rest of me is a chicken of epic proportions. No shocker there, right? I think we’ve already established that fact. The irony isn’t lost on me that I control the world’s most powerful arsenal and yet I’m still too scared to come out to my parents.
At this point waiting to tell my parents until after I propose is completely a matter of selfish practicality. I want my memories of how it felt tofinallypropose to Leo to be pure, untainted by any regret or emotional pain in case my parents disown me and reject Leo as my future husband.
I also know damned well Leo would know something was wrong with me if that happens, I’d be forced to tell him—thus spoiling the surprise—and it would taint his memories of the day, too.
There will be plenty enough time later for them to express their displeasure. I’d rather that not be the lede in every story—PRESIDENT WOODLEY’S FAMILY DISOWNS HIM; HE PROPOSES ANYWAY.
Yeah, no thanks.
Immediately after I do it I’ll call Mom and Dad from the Beast while we’re on our way back to the White House, before there’s time for someone else to tell them. Jordan will no doubt make sure their detail is with them when it happens so they can limit their contact with others until I speak to them.
And, also because I’m a chicken, it means having the talk with them on the phone instead of in person, with Leo and Jordan at my side. I can always end the call if it gets too intense, using my job as an excuse to bail.
Perhaps their rejection won’t hurt as much that way.
Then again, as both Jordan and Casey-Marie have pointed out, maybe them immediately seeing what will undoubtedly be an outpouring of well wishes will prompt them to be more…charitable in their response to me.
Publicly, at least.
Or…not.
Of course, maybe they’ll pleasantly surprise me and be okay with this. Who knows? Getting my hopes up about that could destroy me. If I’m not holding unrealistic expectations it’ll be more difficult for their reaction to disappoint me.
Right?
That’s what I’ll keep telling myself, anyway. Because it wouldn’t surprise me if they suddenly decide they’re not coming to the White House for the holidays after we have our talk. I won’t argue with them about it, either. I won’t beg them to reconsider, or try to get them to change their minds. I’ll tell them that I love them and will always love them.
But I have to start living my life for me without hiding the truth anymore.
Well, without hidingmostof the truth. Obviously afewaspects must remain under wraps. Like our power exchange dynamic.
