Never. He’s been faithful. He fell victim to the core structural weakness within his soul that I’ve always known existed. I purposely left that escape hatch in place and propped open with a cinder block. I wanted him to know I trusted him, loved him, and nothing he confessed to me would make me hate him or run away from what we have.
You might think that’s naive of me, but I read it in his words to Ward. It tore him up inside that he’d broken our vows, and the only reason he was keeping it a secret was to protect Ward fromme. Later, that Liam knew he needed to find a way to break this to me that wouldn’t hurt me, and that would simultaneously protect Ward. So Liam wasn’t planning on stringing both of us along for years. The dumb motherfucker simply jumped the gun on cashing in, and just hadn’t worked his way through his plan for the reveal.
Igetit.
Maybe if Liam had closure with Ward back then, he might have been able to move on and heal more readily and not done this.
Maybe if Ward hadn’t ghosted on him.
Maybe if Ward had left more thanI’m sorrywritten on a piece of paper, a little explanation.
Maybe if Ward had picked up the goddamned phone and talked to Liam, maybe we wouldn’t be here.
Lot of maybes, sure, but they all point to one conclusion—this is all Ward’s fault, when everything’s said and done.
Because he easily could have saidnoto Liam that first day when they talked in Liam’s hideaway office. He didn’t have to drop to his knees for my husband.
The truth is, Ward didn’twantto say no to Liam.
Meaning he still loves my husband.
He broke my husband’s heart in ways I never could mend, no matter how hard I’ve tried to love Liam’s pain away. There were always shards of this trauma and grief deeply embedded within Liam’s soul and far beyond my reach. Like literal shrapnel, there was too much danger to operate, meaning the fragments would have to stay in place, or risk greater injury.
Liam might have recovered in many ways since losing Ward, but he never trulyhealed.
I don’t have any idea what’s going to happen now, but here’s how I look at it. Even if Ward ends up riding off into the sunset with his wife and staying married, maybe now, finally, all these years later, Liam might be able to set aside his burden and move forward and let me love the last of his pain away.
There can be closure.
Either way, my husband canfinallyhave a chance to heal from the inside out.
I hope.
A lesser man might walk away, turn his back on the greatest love he’s ever known, and let his old pain keep him locked in destructive patterns.
Am I referring to myself in that sentence, or to my husband?
Maybe both.
Definitelyboth.
Perhaps it even describes Ward, too. I don’t know.
I love Liam. I would readily kill or die for him.
Literally kill. I haven’t yet, but I’ve come damned close a few times.
I wish I was kidding about that.
Okay, so Liam’s worry that I might have sabotaged Ward’s life had I known his identity before isn’t exactly an…unfoundedone without merit, shall we say?
I hate to admit that because I don’t want Liam knowing every little detail of my sordid professional history. I’m not exactly proud of some of the things I’ve done. It’s always justifiable. I consider it driving the karma bus over someone’s dogma.
Before Liam chose to cash in his HPF, I might have done exactly that to Ward, too, if I could have taken revenge on Ward without it somehow splashing back on my husband or myself. Although, from what I’ve learned, Ward’s father is still a mega fucking asshole, and a dangerous one, politically speaking.
A well-funded one.
Liam wasn’t exaggerating when he said he worried about Mason Rutherford Callahan’s extended reach. From what I’ve learned about that man over the past couple of weeks, he is a very dangerous political operative, with even more dangerous friends, and it’s the other reason I have held off triggering any ratfucks that could implicate Ward in anything.
