“I gave you my word I’m taking care of you, and I meant it.”
“But what doyouwant?”
Shit. Leo was always good about not talking too much to me about Elliot’s personal stuff. Just like I knew he afforded me the same privacy in return.
One thing he did tell me once was that Elliot self-sabotages, blows up getting his needs met.
Like he doesn’t think he deserves nice things.
I can not only see that, I think I sort of perversely understand it. It’s kind of the track my mental train is running away from me on now.
There’s only one right answer for me, in this moment. I sit up and drape my arms over his shoulders. “I want to be righthere,withyou, doing whatever it is you need me to do for you to achieve whatever it is you decide to do. Run for president, transition to private life, go teach economics—whatever it is. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. When you’re ready to take the next step and bring Leo in permanently, I’m here for that, too. Understand?”
“Yes, Sir.”
I giggle.
“Dammit,” he mutters. “See what I mean? I’m a sucky sadist.”
I kiss him. “I think you’re exactly who I need you to be.”
I only hope I can be exactly who he needs me to be for him in return.
