Throughout all of this, however, I really haven’t talked much about myself personally. Haven’t admitted I’m gay, haven’t told him I’m available. I’ve stayed away from that third-rail topic, for now.
There’s time for that once I’ve sussed him out better.
Finally, we head to campaign headquarters to catch up with everyone. It’ll be a working dinner, with catering from Kev’s favorite Chinese restaurant. Elliot’s not there yet when we arrive, and Jordan sits down with Shae and Chris to go over his notes.
I struggle not to laugh when Chris catches my eye at one point and drops me a wink. I now understand what he meant earlier—and he was right.
Damn, was he right.
Elliot finally arrives and I can’t help but notice his scowl upon seeing Jordan before he immediately schools his expression, followed by his usual warm smile when I introduce Jordan to him.
You know…
I could be arealfucking dick.
No, seriously, I could.
It’d be too damned easy to use Jordan, to play him against Elliot and try to pry my guy’s ass out of his head with psychological shock and awe methods.
Except that’d be the bad kind of sadism.
It’d be using Jordan without him even knowing what I was really up to, and that’s just douchey.
Here’s the real problem, though—Iwantto talk to Jordan about all of this, and maybe do something very,verybad with him.
Maybe a whole lot of bad somethings.
Not like Elliot hasn’t practically tried to shove me head-first into the dating pool, right?
My first opening comes once we’ve sat down to eat. “You know, Leo,” Shae says. “If you’d like to go home, there’s no real reason for you to hang around tonight. We’ll be busy with this for a while.”
I note the tense set of Elliot’s shoulders, where he’s sitting across the conference table from me. Normally, if he’s here, I’m here, even if I’m not needed.
“Actually, I thought I’d hang around for a while. Jordan’s hotel is on the way to my place. I figured I’d make sure he gets back there safely. I did tell him he could ask me questions about White House operations. It’ll give us time to talk some more.”
Jordan’s face lights up while Elliot tries to hide another scowl.
“Unless, of course,” I add, “Mr. Woodley needs my assistance tonight.” I’m looking right at him when I say that.
Part of me is praying Elliot says yes, he does need me. A very large part.
I hate that part of me is hoping he doesn’t, so I can spend more time with Jordan, because I’m fucking lonely.
It shouldn’t be like this between us. Not after all the years we have together.
It shouldn’t be like this.
Elliot swallows hard but doesn’t meet my gaze. Finally, looking a wee bit ill as he does, he shakes his head a little. “No,” he manages. “I didn’t have anything on my schedule.”
I offer Jordan a wide smile even as I shove back my anger. “Then I guess you can have me all to yourself tonight.”
He grins. “Yay!”
I nearly giggle at Jordan’s enthusiasm. Even if nothing else happens besides me having a nice chat with him tonight and we share a cab, it’ll have been worth it.
Oooh, Elliot’s really looking sick to his stomach now.
Yeah, my territorial pet’s not so magnanimous when there’s something personal on the line. Sure, it makes me a dick but maybe it’ll finally produce some results.
