“Please?”
“I’m tired, Governor, and I want to go home. What do you need?”
He studies me. “Come over tonight,” he whispers. “Please?”
I don’t understand why I viscerally rebel against his plea. “I’ll see you in the morning, Governor.”
His next words stop me in my tracks. “Do you want me to send Declan over?”
Red Rover, red Rover…
I turn. “Good night, Governor. Mr. Howard. I’ll see you gentlemen in the morning.”
I’m already in the elevator and the door is sliding shut when I see George emerge from his office, slipping through it and pulling it shut behind him as he tucks his shirt in, then freezing when he spots me in the elevator. I take a little smug satisfaction in the consternation on his face as I waggle my fingers at him.
With my own emotions so mixed up, the last thing I need to do tonight is dump sex on top of them.
What Ineedto do, before I’m sucked any deeper into this, is sort out how and why I feel the way I do. I’ve just spent the past twelve years in a secret relationship with Declan. Which wasn’t fair to him, but he seemed to enjoy it. Now he’s in another secret relationship. I’m not submissive, so I’m not sure there’s even room for something long-term between me and George, and it’s not fair to yank Declan back and forth between us.
Did I fuck myself over giving Declan to George?
Yeah, I guess I did.
My girl’s never coming home. Ever. I can no longer engage in quiet, secret fantasies of her one day telling me she’s divorcing George and begging me to take her back.
I blink away my tears before the elevator door slides open in the parking garage, and I hurry to my car before the fucking sadist thinks to call his detail to hold me there or spin me around and send me back upstairs.
I manage to keep my tears at bay until I’m on my way home. By the time I arrive, Declan’s tried to call me twice on my personal cell, but I send it to voice mail and he doesn’t leave a message.
Once I’m through my gate, I override it with my app so Declan won’t be able to open it and I lock myself inside my house.
All I want to do tonight is wallow in my self-pity and figure out what the hell I’m supposed to do with my life now.
