“I don’twantyou to replace her. I want you to beyou.”
“I mean, I’m not ever going to be submissive.”
“Ahem,” Declan says.
George smiles and points at Declan. “I have him for that. I get the best of both worlds like this.”
I look over my shoulder at Declan. “What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Are you getting everything you want?”
Declan kisses me. “Wouldn’t mind a few extra freebie days here and there. I like it when you release control to me occasionally. Just on occasion, to clarify. But that’s your call.”
George clears his throat.
I laugh. “And his.”
“I’m not sure I can handle watching more freebie days between you,” George says. “Not if that’s a hint of what I can look forward to. I was seriously close to stopping things.” His expression darkens. “I know I’m a sadist, but I really did not enjoy seeing you two like that.”
Another prickle of tears hits me. George really is a big softy. It makes me feel even more guilty for how I treated him in the beginning, when he first met Ellen. I know my girl was happy and well-loved through the years she was with him. “Sorry.”
We finally untangle from each other. Declan makes me and George both laugh when he scoops me into his arms and carries me into the bathroom. There, we climb into the shower together, where they hold me cradled between them. Then it’s back to the bedroom, where Declan is ready for round two.
I only manage to get George moderately stiff. He’s so exhausted from the day, and from stress, that once Declan and I both come again George is happy to pull me into his arms and spoon along my back, with Declan in front of me.
For the first time, I don’t feel those old, ugly whispered warnings chattering in my brain.
I feel…safe. Like maybe I can finally release my death-grip on my life.
I trusted my girl. I trusted her completely. I can close my eyes and imagine her tucked against him, just like this, his larger body protectively wrapped around her, holding her as they slept.
You know…
My left thumb rubs the two rings on my ring finger.
Maybe Icouldget used to this. I have no desire to be submissive, but this wasn’t the worst way to spend a night.
“Maybe I could start spending more nights with you guys,” I softly admit.
George nuzzles the back of my head. “That would not be objectionable.”
In the dark, Declan finds my hand, twines his fingers with mine, and gives me a long, gentle squeeze.