Right now, it feels like everything around me dies upon contact, and that makes me afraid.
Another feeling I’m not familiar with.
At all.
Maybe I was born under a cursed sign. Maybe there is something to the supernatural.
Maybe there’s too much of the wrong kind of genes in me from my motherand father.
I startle awake to a hand grabbing my ankle and one covering my mouth. The TV’s off, and the room’s in total darkness. My rational mind hasn’t kicked in yet, and danger brain is in control of my fight-or-flight reflex. I struggle, flailing, helpless.
I’m flipped over, and a heavy body presses me into the bed, knees force my thighs apart, and a hand plunges between my legs, two fingersroughly spearing me and making me struggle harder.
“Something from your Sir,” the low, coarse voice rumbles in my ear.
Before I can process that, the fingers disappear, replaced by a cock.
I’m still frantically trying to shove the weight off me when enough adrenaline dumps into my mind to wake me up to actually understand what’s going on.
Chris.
This is Chris.
He’s back.
He must have realizedI’m now on board, because the hand disappears from my mouth when he realizes there’s no longer any danger of me screaming for help. He fists my hair, hauling my head back so he can plant a rough kiss on my lips.
He’s naked—goddamn, I must have been sleeping deeper than I realized—and I can smell Kevin on him, his sweat, his tears.
His cum.
He didn’t shower before he returned, bringing a littleof our love home to me.
He pulls out and flips onto his back, grabbing me and dragging me onto him. I quickly find his cock and mount him, leaning in to kiss him, to smell him, to try to tease every last bit of our missing husband to me. I ride him and lick, sniff, kiss. If this is all I can have of Kev right now while he tries to rebuild himself, then I’ll take it.
I’ll take whatever I canget.
Chris rakes his nails along my thighs, up my back, and I can’t get enough of him. This isn’t making love—it’s sex, it’s the sadist, it’s a raw abrasion of my aching heart and soul but I know it’s the only way to heal.
He reaches between us and uses his fingers to get me there, but it’s more because I know it’s what Kev would want me to do, and would be doing to me himself if he were here.It’s honoring him and what we have. It’s the knowledge that we took vows to each other, and I need to do a better job giving Kevin what he needs, not what I want to give him.
Right now, he needs space, and I have to give it to him.
He’ll come back when he’s ready and able.
I’ll be his good girl, and I’ll make him proud in the meantime.
I finally make it over. Chris rolls me onto my back andfinishes quickly, then lies there with our foreheads touching, just breathing, nuzzling noses.
“Did you give him my kiss?” I ask.
“I did, baby. First thing.”
“When is he coming home?” I didn’t mean to ask it, but it boils free from my pain like a toxic steam bubble that has to escape.
He sighs. “He’s going to see how he feels. He’s no good to anyone if he bursts into tears in a staff meeting.He’s worried about letting you down and not being able to do his job. I gave him what he needed last night and tonight. He’s still…processing.”
We have the election coming up. I should be on the campaign trail, but I have surrogates going out for me right now.
