Yet he has practically no self-confidence, thanks to his thundercunt of a mother. Now that I’ve met her, and Owen understands I’m not scared off by her, that hurdle’s successfully been jumped. I know one of Owen’s fears was that I would meet her, be charmed by her, and not believe a word he said about her and think he was a liar.
The thing is, I completely believed him when he told me about his mother and what she’d done to him over the years. Absolutely. I’ve known people just like he described.
Survived my own relationship with one.
Barely.
I can’t tell Owen any of that yet, though. Not now, and maybe never. I don’t like to think about Elsa, or what I survived under her. Unless Owen is committed to me, I don’t want to bare myself like that to him. Even if I do decide to tell him some of it, there are parts of that tale I will never talk about.
Parts of it that need to die with me, and with Eddie.
Seeing Owen in the belly of the beast, how he reacted to his mother—how he deferred to her—gives me my best tactical advantage of how I can manipulate him.
Uh,hello, bastard.
He responds quite well to positive reinforcement. I learned that the day I met him.
I also want to see what buttons I might have to push when a little extra motivation is needed, as well as what triggers I need to avoid entirely so I don’t trip an emotional IED and get my balls metaphorically blown off in the fallout.
Susa? That’s easy, a no-brainer. Iknowwhat she wants. She’s not coy at all when it comes to stating her case.
But I want Owen. He’s my true endgame.
Susa’s my ace-in-the-hole.
Except I have to get Owentothe hole before I can actually play it.
Thanks to Elandra and Austin, it looks like I’ll easily be able to get what I want.
God help them if they try to fuck with my boy once he’s well and trulymine. Because Iwillbring the wrath of the heavens down upon them.
Hell, I’ll turn Susa loose on them. They’ll never know what hit them.
Owen’s special, malleable, willing, and open.
All I need to do is show him how good it can be and coax him into our arms—me and Susa.
First, though, I need to make sure I haven’t been misreading his nonverbal cues all this time. Cues I’m sure he doesn’t even realize he’s throwing off.
The way he started getting doors for me and for Susa. The way he willingly takes care of both of us, without us even asking.
Despite us telling him he doesn’t have to.
It makes him happy when we thank him, give him praise.
Hug him.
Snuggling with him on Susa’s couch to watch TV, all three of us, it lights those gorgeous green eyes of his in a way I’ve never seen anyone glow before.
He loves and appreciates the simple things most people take for granted.
It makes me want to make him mine even more, mold his natural tendencies around me and Susa so he never wants to leave us, and then spend the rest of our lives together making each other happy.
Yeah, I’m a bastard, all right.
Ask me if I care what you think about me.
Using Susa’s house for Owen’s birthday weekend will logistically make everything so much easier on me. Not just for working with him, but hopefully allowing Owen to more readily open up to me without her around.
