Because when I watch Susa watching him, the excitement in her eyes, her rewarding me for being her good boy…
It’s all worth it.
Every bit of it.
Carter was right about me not looking up shit online, though. Because too much of it’s porn. The sites he’s directed me to have been helpful, even if I still seek answers within myself.
The emotional math isn’t complicated—one narcissistic parent, one absent parent (thanks, Mom) and throw in a nasty divorce. A woman who wasn’t happy unless she was making me suffer.
A woman I’ve never been able to please in my life.
A woman I can never remember telling me “good boy” one single time. It’s no wonder I’m addicted to Susa and Carter’s positive reinforcement.
We hit turbulence, and suddenly, my hand is tightly engulfed by Carter’s. When I look, he’s facing straight ahead, his eyes squeezed closed. His hand on Susa’s thigh hasn’t moved, though, even though her hand now rests over his. She seems to be asleep, or nearly so, even though it’s difficult to tell with her sleep mask on. Then again, she’s an experienced flier.
Whatever happened this weekend away from my ken can wait.Ifanything happened. There’s a very good chance nothing happened other than shopping.
I squeeze back, letting Carter know I’m there and not going anywhere.
I see him silently mouth,Thank you.
I will not ask him about it now. If there is anything that happened and he wants to tell me, he will. If he doesn’t, fair enough.
Considering what he’s been through, he probably doesn’t have good memories to associate with flying. I don’t want to add to his stress by being a needy pet on top of that. This is one small way I can serve him.
And considering how much I gained this weekend by him and Susa pushing me to go, actually taking me, and being there with me to support me…
Well, I know he’s my friend. Both of them are. They love me. That’s all that matters.
His grip eases about twenty minutes after the last bump, but he doesn’t let go, and I make no move to free my hand. In fact, he strokes the back of my hand with his thumb. We finally land at Tampa without dying, and it’s not until we’re on the ground that he releases me and takes a deep breath.
“Sorry that wasn’t very ‘masterly’ of me,” he softly snarks.
But I reach out and stay him with my hand. “Carter,” I say.
He looks at me.
“Considering how much you support me, if you think I’m not going to support you when you need me, think again.”
He reaches out and squeezes my hand. “Thank you, Owen.”
“You’re welcome,Sir.”
He smiles. “My good boy.”
Susa clears her throat, and he rolls his eyes. “Fine.Ourgood boy. Happy?”
She grins, making me chuckle. “Yep.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
We stop to eat dinner on the way back to Susa’s. But we’re only at Susa’s long enough to unload her things—including the new suitcase full of stuff she purchased in Las Vegas—and hug her good-bye. I want to help her unpack, but Carter and Susa insist that’s not necessary tonight.
We return to the dorm room and without thinking, I immediately strip and retrieve the tether from its storage tote and set it up, donning my cuffs and collar.
I didn’t realize how much I’d missed wearing them this weekend, but I did.
When I turn, I realize Carter’s been watching me this whole time, leaning against the wall and with his arms crossed over his chest.
