The days after I gave my statement to IA was wrought with tension and discord. Many of my fellow officers felt I should’ve just kept my mouth shut and that my loyalty should’ve been given to Jimmy over the investigation. It was that line of thinking that I didn’t agree with and I never backed down or apologized for telling the truth. My refusal to conform to their ways made my life a living hell at work, but I had no regrets.
Not long after everything went down, Kyle announced that he was moving back to Ohio. I jumped on the chance for a new start for my career and my relationship with him because I thought that my job stress played a big role in the decline in our relationship. Kyle was willing to give it a try too, but we learned that a relationship between us just wasn’t meant to be. I got my fresh start with my career and found the love I had been searching for. I had put my time with the MPD behind me and focused on my new life. The look on Jimmy’s face said that he hadn’t put my involvement behind him.
As best as I understood it, Jimmy was forced into an early retirement. They couldn’t prove that he deliberately set Ace up to get killed and Jimmy sure as hell didn’t confess, but his behavior, if not criminal, was unethical. A person I had once admired was someone I came to resent. He represented a level of evil and corruption that I’d never understand. I’d heard through the rumor mill that Jimmy blamed me and my testimony for the reason he was forced out of the department, although he never once said anything to me about it.
“Should I be concerned that you’re looking that intently at another man?” Josh asked, bringing me back to the present.
I hadn’t been lying when I told Josh I couldn’t talk about it. Criminal charges were never filed against Jimmy and I figured it was part of his retirement deal. Ace’s family sued the city of Miami and won a settlement. I had to fly back to Miami and give a deposition, but I wasn’t called to give testimony during the trial. My union rep had advised me not to discuss the case with anyone because criminal charges could be filed if new evidence was introduced, say someone’s guilty conscience got the better of them.
I tore my eyes from Jimmy’s sneering face and focused back on Josh. “A ghost from the past,” I told him, “and absolutely nothing for you to worry about.”
“Do you want to leave?” Josh asked worriedly.
I shoved all thoughts of Jimmy aside and reached for Josh’s hand. “No way. I can’t wait until you try their seafood. There’s nothing like it in Ohio.” I knew what he was going to say so I cut him off. “Red Lobster doesn’t count. You’ll see.”
I was so busy enjoying Josh’s seafood porn faces that I didn’t even know when Jimmy left the restaurant. I laughed at the crestfallen expression on Josh’s face when he looked down and saw that his plate was empty.
“I don’t know why,” he said after I commented on his cute little pout. “I couldn’t eat another bite if I tried.”
“How about we work some of it off with a nice stroll on the beach?” I asked.
The breeze coming off the ocean rustled through Josh’s fair strands of hair as he titled his head back and breathed in the air. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply before he released the breath slowly. “It’s beautiful here,” he said.
“This part is,” I agreed. “There are parts that are going downhill; the neighborhood I grew up in is one of them. I can’t speak for everywhere, but the middle class is getting smaller and smaller here. I wish I could say it was because they were moving up, but that’s not the truth. I hate seeing empty buildings where thriving businesses used to be and neighborhoods where kids can no longer safely play in their yards.”
“I think that’s happening everywhere,” Josh said. “Politicians are too busy fighting each other instead of fighting hunger and poverty.”
“True,” I said. “How the hell did we get onto such morose subjects on a beautiful night like this?” I asked.
“You started it,” Josh said petulantly, making me laugh.
“You’re right, I did.”
“So, can I assume that the ‘old ghost’ in the restaurant has something to do with the things you can’t talk about because I don’t see that guy being an old boyfriend.”
“You assumed correctly, even though I’m not sure how you did it,” I replied.
“He’s not your type,” Josh said with an arrogant lift of his chin.
“Look who’s stereotyping now,” I admonished, then playfully nudged him with my shoulder. “I thought you weren’t my type once upon a time.”
“You were dumb then,” Josh quipped. “Besides, I don’t care what you say, Mr. Rogers was never going to be your type, regardless of his neighborhood.”
I laughed when I realized that Jimmy did somewhat look like the guy from the kid’s show that ran for decades on PBS. “You got me,” I confessed.
“But will I keep you?” Josh asked playfully.
“I guess time will tell.”
Josh pulled his hand from mine, rolled up the legs of his jeans to mid-calf, and removed his shoes. “I’ve been here for an entire day and haven’t gotten my toes wet yet.”
I waited until he was ankle deep in the water before I hollered, “Look out for the alligators.”
“What?” he shrieked. “Jackass,” he yelled when I threw my head back and laughed at him.
I removed my shoes and rolled up my jeans too, then followed him into the water. It was a beautiful time of the night with the sun going down and most of the beach goers looking for something to eat after being in the sun all day. It seemed like I didn’t have to force “the moment” because it was upon me.
Josh jumped in my arms, wrapped his legs around my waist, and his arms around my neck. I didn’t even care that my clothes were getting soaked from his wet legs and feet. All I cared about was the look of happiness in his eyes and the pride I felt because I put that look in them.
