He slams me against the nearest wall before I can finish my sentence, baring his teeth at me. I hold myself still. After the little performance upstairs, I know he’s trying to regain some of his dignity, some illusion of control.
For the sake of the Empire, I’ll let him have it.
We both know he’s been out of the game too long.
One strike, and I can send him sprawling back.
And one moment is all I need to prove my point and make him back off enough for me to do everything.
Still, I can’t bring myself to do it.
Despite all the cruelty, and all the years he spent throwing me scraps, I don’t want to hit him again.
Like it or not, Jack Payne is the reason I have the power I do today.
Because of him, I was given the chance to command fear and respect in every room I set foot in.
He’s a bastard of a father, but that doesn’t change what he’s done for me.
Goddamn it.
“I knew you were all talk,” Jack sneers. “All those years, and all those lessons I’ve taught you. What’s the most important rule of survival?”
I shove him away, and he takes an uncertain step back. “Never let them see you falter.”
His eyes move over me. “She’s made you weak. I can smell it all over you. You are going to send her back to work in the club, and we’re going to invite our enemies to see she meansnothingto you. When sufficient time has passed, you can have her back, provided, of course, you keep her in check. I don’t want to catch so much as awhiffof her name in our ranks.”
I level him with a look. “And if I refuse?”
“You are a Payne.” Jack’s voice is steel. “You owe your allegiance and everything you are to this family. I am not in the habit of making an enemy out of flesh and blood, but don’t push me. You have no idea what I’m capable of.”
Except I do.
I walk a fine line between keeping our enemies in check and making sure my humanity survives.
My father, on the other hand, gave up any pretense of being human when we laid my mother to rest.
Sometimes, I wonder if he left more than his heart in the ground with her.
He reaches for his drink and takes a few sips. “You’ve worked hard to build everything up. It would be a shame to watch it all crumble.”
He’s right.
Whatever little crumbs of approval he’s been throwing me, I’ve worked hard for. I’ve sweat, bled, and taken lives for the man in front of me, still as imposing and commanding despite the lines around his eyes and the smattering of silver in his hair.
You’re still the little boy who wants his father to pat him on the head and tell him what a good job he’s doing. You’re always going to be that little boy, and you know it.
Do I have what it takes to go up against my father’s wrath?
I’m not sure I want to.
As far as the empire is concerned, nothing has changed.
Except we both know it has.
The minute I went to save London against everyone’s advice, I not only risked my father’s wrath, I also painted a bright red target on my back and hers.
Michael and Lance were probably laughing at how easy it was to bait me.
