Page 42 of Own Me


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Those had been the days of being a dreamer while still enjoying the simplest of things. What I found so fascinating about being around Sasha was that even though he had all the money in the world, he was easygoing and could enjoy just spending time together.

His house was to die for, the landscaping with the pool and cabana just incredible. But it all faded away in seeing how he was with Nina.

“What do you think?” The little girl swept out her arms, spinning around in a circle.

“Oh, my goodness. This is perfect.” I’d never seen a child’s bedroom that was so artistic and colorful. As I moved further into the room, I marveled at the art on her walls. “Did you paint those?”

“Yep. Dad helped, but he’s not very talented, so I had to tell him what to do.”

The pictures on the refrigerator hadn’t done her talent justice. “You are… a little artist, girlfriend.” She beamed from my compliment. The room was meant for a princess, but one who’d already grown out of a white canopy bed with frilly pillows into one with blond wood and ornate carvings. Still very feminine, yet older.

Before Sasha knew it, Nina would be on the far side of being a teenager.

“Lainey. Come see her playroom.” Emily was so much like Nina I could easily tell why they were besties. I also adored her mother, even if Halle had almost had a stroke when the microphone hadn’t worked.

Just being able to see Sasha’s entire family together was amazing and made me miss mine. They were just like any other family enjoying a wonderful celebration on a perfect day. I’d had the distinct feeling that very few people were ever allowed to see them so casually. Just being a family.

With hopes and dreams, aspirations and enjoying being together.

“Oh, my goodness,” I said as both girls took me into the playroom. It was huge, twice the size of Nina’s bedroom. There was the same theme of art on the walls, but I had a better opportunity to see what Sasha had playfully warned me about.

There were dolls on one shelf, trucks and kit cars on the one below, books on another and what had to be science experiments that somehow had gone a little off kilter on another. There was a softball bat in one corner, a boogey board in another, and an easel directly in front of the double window.

Very closely I walked toward the table near the picture she’d already been working on, placing the box of paints and colored pencils, brushes and sponges on the surface. Outside the window, the party raged on, the sun just beginning to set creating a warm glow across the backyard. Even with the slight shimmer of sun casting rays on the window, I could clearly see Sasha standing peering up at the glass as if searching for me.

Why was it that every time I was in a room near him, my entire body tingled?

“Do you like it?” Nina asked, the concern in her voice reminding me of myself at her age. Always eager to please.

“This is amazing.”

Her bright smile was my reward.

There was a hammock for two, a tent that appeared straight out of a fairytale, and a red velvet loveseat matching a plush chair with a yellow table in between. With her own bathroomoff to the side, I could only imagine how much time Nina spent dreaming of princes and knights.

Just like I’d done as a kid. Even the colors in the bathroom were electric. I couldn’t say Sasha had tried to squash his daughter’s creative streak.

“And I thought your father was the eclectic one,” I told them after peering into the bathroom. Another obvious love. Fishes. Her shower curtain was a colorful display of saltwater creatures.

The two girls looked at me, obviously unsure what I was telling them.

“If you mean I’m weirder than Dad, you’re right.” Nina was so serious, so old for her age. No wonder Sasha had a few gray hairs.

“Weird is good. Look at me. I’m very weird.”

As I spun around in a circle, I threw my arms out hoping I wouldn’t seem too weird to the girls.

“But we like you,” Emily answered as if for both.

“Why, thank you very much. I like you too. Now, show me everything.”

As they jabbered on, Nina proudly showing off everything she’d had a hand in creating, I slid next to the wall opposite the door, able to see the gorgeous stairs from where I was sitting.

“Lainey. Grammy said she might get me a pony for my birthday.” Nina was fairly confident, her little eyebrows furrowed together.

I could only imagine how well that would go over with Sasha. “Wow. Do you think he’ll like your room?”

Now I was on the receiving end of the big eye roll.