I could do this.
I had the strength.
Waaaah…
The sharp wail drew my attention and my eyes flew open. What?
Now my hand was shaking as I jerked the gun free, trying to figure out what I’d heard. The sound occurred again. A wail. A cry. A little cry.
Oh, my God. What the hell was I doing? What the fuck was wrong with me?
Very carefully I placed the gun on the table and struggled to my feet, forced to grip the back of the chair to keep from falling. With another cry, I was suddenly sober, the ache and anger pushed aside.
All I could think about was getting to her.
To my baby daughter.
I stumbled up the stairs, rushing to her room, thanking God my father had insisted on installing baby monitors all throughout the house.
Throwing open the door to her room, I took a few seconds to catch my breath, staring at the spinning mobile over her bed providing sparkles of light.
With cautious steps, I walked closer, realizing she wasn’t crying. She was laughing, reaching up to the stars, her little eyes as bright as they were in the sky.
“Oh, my baby. My baby girl.” Scooping her up in my arms, I held her tightly, holding back sobs as she reached for the mobile. “You like that, huh?”
She giggled again and reached for my face, placing her tiny fingers against my cheek.
“Oh, Nina. You don’t have to worry. Daddy is going to get better. For you. For us. You’re my everything.” As soon as Ibegan to hum a song my mother had sung to me a very long time before, she cocked her head. She was listening.
I moved to the rocking chair, the one that had taken us so long to find, testing at least two dozen before finding the right one. As I sat down, she laid her head against my chest and for the first time, I began to sing. Softly. Slowly.
Rocking.
Singing.
And soon, my little baby girl, my miracle angel and the breath of my life was fast asleep.
CHAPTER 1
Six and a half years later…
Sasha
“Stop worrying,Halle. The party is going to go off without a hitch.” I backed against the wall as a rush of people flooded the corridor behind the stage. Reporters were everywhere, roadies trying to weave their way through the crowd so they could begin dismantling the set.
“Are you kidding me?” she snorted. “You put me in charge of this birthday party and everything must and will be perfect.”
Another memory brought me to a halt. Fuck. It was like clockwork although this year, the date had snuck up on me. I’d already walked several laps around my resort and the concert hall during the arduous day, acting like a tiger pacing his cage. I’d spent an hour in Dreamscape’s gym pumping iron and jumping rope. It had done nothing but put me in a foul mood given the conversations I’d overheard.
I’d been surrounded by happy people celebrating birthdays and anniversaries. There’d even been one guy chatting with astranger about his dozen ideas for proposing to his girlfriend of two years. It had taken every ounce of my control not to drop a hundred-pound weight on his head.
It went without saying I was in a nasty mood and crowds didn’t help.
“Sasha. Are you with me?” Halle chided.
I glanced at my watch, waiting until my vision had cleared. Goddamn, I loathed being chained to the past. “I’m here.”
Which was only partially correct. I hated the date on the calendar. I had for seven fucking years.
