“You went without a long time after the first time at the auction. In fact, you didn’t have sex with me again until our wedding day, then months later at the next auction. Then, as far as I know, we didn’t have sex again, even at the next auction.”Her voice cracks and I suck in a sharp breath. I wait for her to continue, but she doesn’t say anything else.
“It’s not because I didn’t want you.” She scoffs and I know she’s remembering how I forced her, how I promised her I’d make it good for her. I did anything but that, at least in the beginning.
Realization dawns on me. “You don’t remember anything after the third auction.”
She shrugs. “So. I’m sure I’ll remember, eventually.”
“You remember being taken?” She crosses her arms under her tits, pushing them up and giving me a glimpse of more skin.
“Yes. I told you that.”
“By who?”
She hugs herself tighter as she looks from my eyes to my shoulder and back to my eyes. I tilt my head slightly, waiting for her answer.
“I don’t know. They put something over my head.”She’s lying. Why would she lie to me?She told me that before, so it should seem true, but I can always tell when she’s lying. And she did the same thing the last time she told me that.
She wants me to be honest with her, but she’s not doing the same. I’ll leave that for now. At this moment, I need her to trust me. Maybe if she trusts me, she’ll tell me things she didn’t tell me before. “So, you don’t remember what happened after we got you and brought you home?”
She sighs and shakes her head. “I remember going to the auction, then going to the bathroom, then being taken, and that’s it.” She squeezes her eyes shut like she’s trying to force herself to remember more.
She pushes away from my desk and begins to pace in front of the windows. “And I remember the first auction. At least parts of it. I thought you saved me from someone else buying me.” A sob escapes her, and she places the palms of her hands against hereyes. “But you were using me. For this vendetta you have against my father.”
I want to grab her and pull her into my arms, but I know she won’t welcome it right now. She stops pacing and faces me, tears brimming in her eyes. I know she won’t let them fall though, not if she remembers those months after I bought her.
“Do you really love me?”
I stare at her for a moment before I finally give in, grab her hand, and pull her into my chest. I wrap my arm around her waist, cup the back of her head, and place my forehead against hers.
“What I feel for you is more than love.” I brush my lips against hers, but only briefly. “These past two months without you have been something I never want to experience again. When you were kidnapped and I had no idea where you were, that was torture. Not knowing if I’d ever see you again. I had already determined I wouldn’t live without you.” She gasps and grips my biceps.
“Life isn’t worth living without you. Yes, when I first met you, I wanted to use you to get to your father. But I quickly realized you owned me. Even before we graduated, I knew I would do absolutely anything to have you and keep you.”
I kiss her and she responds like she always does. She wraps her arms around me as I lick into her mouth and suck on her tongue. She’s a drug that I’ll never not be addicted to. She feeds my black soul. Even though I know I should give her up, I won’t. Because I’m that selfish. She will always be mine. Always.
Chapter 8
McKenize
I’ve missed this. I’ve missed him. I know I need to tell him about who took me the first time. Who I’m almost certain took me the second time. But he has his mom on this pedestal, and I’m not sure he’ll be willing to take her down. Not even for me.
He kisses me like his life depends on it. Like I’m the very essence of his life. When he pulls back, I suck in a breath.Maybe he would take her down for me.
“So, you do love me,” I murmur.
He chuckles and pulls me over to his chair. He sits and pulls me into his lap. “I do.” He has no idea how much I needed to hear him say that. “I hate the first time I said that to you was when you couldn’t remember everything else we’ve been through together.”
I lean back and stare at him, letting his words sink in. “So, we never said that to each other before?”
He shakes his head as he runs his hand through my hair, his eyes tracing the movement. “No. I regretted it every single day. When you came back after the first time you were taken, you were…” He pauses as he thinks back to days I still don’t remember. “Different.”
I tilt my head at him as he continues to run his fingers through my hair. “Different how?”
His hands pause as he looks over my shoulder like he’s remembering. “You were sick of my shit and you called me out on it.”
I chuckle, imagining what he means. I realized it was his mom and his whole reasoning behind buying me was bullshit. But if he’s saying now, he wanted me in spite of that. That he loves me. Maybe he will choose me. I wouldn’t have known that then.
Pushing those thoughts out of my mind, my eyes land on the spot just below his ear. I frown that there isn’t a mark there.Why would there be? I’ve been gone for two months.He smirks and tilts his head. “Go on, love.”
