“Yeah.” I close my laptop. “Sounds good.” I text Isaac to remind him to go to Brittney’s last day lunch before heading out with my one and only ex.
It’samazing all the things you forget. It’s only been four years since I’ve seen Hunter, but in that time I must have changed a lot. Or I’ve been through more than I thought. For example, I forgot about the tiny mole beneath his lower lip on the left side of his face. The way I used to stare at it before we got together. I forgot how easily he can make me laugh, but almost more importantly, I forgot how funny he thinksIam.
This is why we were best friends.Fifteen minutes into lunch, he looks twenty times better than he did when I walked into the meeting this morning. When he says, “Fuck, I needed this,” I know it’s because of me.
“You look great,” he says.
I smile. “Thanks. You’ve looked better, but it’s understandable.”
“What can I say—running a company doesn’t agree with me, I guess.”
“I’m kidding. You look good, Hunter. Really. You could use some sun, but otherwise… How’s LA?”
“You know—loud. Obnoxious. Overwhelming.”
“Where are you living?”
“Hollywood Hills.”
“Nice.”
“Are you still mad at me?” he asks suddenly.
It takes me a minute to adjust to the subject change. I take a sip of my water and become very aware of my eyelashes fluttering stupidly. “I—no. I mean, you apologized.”
“Accepting an apology doesn’t mean you forgave me.”
“I get that, but I know you weren’t trying to hurt me.”
“I wasn’t,” he says, sincerely. “I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing, and I can’t believe how bad I let myself fuck us up.”
Oh, wow. I wasn’t expecting that. For three years in college, Hunter and I were practically inseparable. Then, suddenly, senior year, he went wild, and I guess he expected me to go along for the ride. I was the first and only guy he’d ever been with, and I guess that wasn’t enough. It wasn’t so much that he wanted to open the relationship itself—he just wanted to experiment with new partners. On me. With me. Near me. And it wasn’t just that. He made an Only Fans account where he documented and profited off our exploits with strangers. It was one of those things that started off slow and then snowballed until I was the frog boiling in a pot of water.
It left me feeling unwanted, inadequate, and wanting the fuck out.
I need to change the subject. “Um…are you seeing anyone?”
He shakes his head. “Not with work the way it’s been. I’m a mess, honestly. I did come out, though. Shocker, no one was surprised.”
“Being bi is?—”
“Evan, I think you and I both know I’m not bi.”
“Oh.”
He gives me a rueful grin. “I guess it was my way of easing myself into things.”
“I totally get that.”
“So you made a fucking app?”
I grin. “It’s more like software, and it’s still a work in progress. Isaac might have oversold it a little.”
“But you’re gonna finish it, right?”
“Well, yeah. Probably not by myself, but my roommate can do almost anything with a computer.” I get a vibrating feeling in the pit of my stomach at the thought of Deacon. I may be fucking Isaac, but he’s not a serious prospect. What we have iscasual and fun—a way to blow off steam. Deacon however? I’ve had a crush on him since I interviewed to be his new roommate. In terms of attainability—he’s as far out of reach as Isaac but for totally different reasons. For one—he might be straight. For another, we’ve been living with each other for months, and he’s never even checked out my ass. He’s not interested, and it’s lowkey devastating.
“Well, it sounds like something we could really use,” Hunter says.
