“But it’s a thing?”
“Technically? It is a thing,” he says with a sigh.
“What would he think about this?”
“It’s not the same for him,” Isaac says brutally. “I don’t think he has a clue how I feel, and if he does, he doesn’t care.”
“Is he an asshole?”
A pained look crosses his face, creasing his brow and turning his lips downward. “No. Not at all.”
“Good, because I’d tell you that you can probably do better.”
“Iamtrying.” His dark gaze holds a shimmer of meaning I have no hope of grasping.
“You do seem like you’re enjoying yourself,” I say.
“I am. I’m enjoying you, too.”
My smile is small. “Same.”
“Yeah?” he asks.
I take my chances and lie down beside him. If I fall asleep, so be it, I guess. “I’ve never done much more than hook up with randoms.”
He runs a hand from my cheek through my hair. His gaze flits between my eyes and my mouth. “You’ve never dated someone?”
“Is that what you’re proposing?” I ask.
“It could be,” he tells me.
“Doesn’t sound like I’ve really got a shot,” I say. “Love is a strong word.”
“I need to get over it.”
“If he doesn’t know how you feel about him, you should say something.”
He winces. “I’m not sure I can.”
“Why?” I ask.
“Can I just say it’s complicated?”
“You could…”
Isaac is quiet a long moment, studying my face. “I do fuck him,” he finally says.
The words land awkwardly in my chest, like they’re not sure where to slot themselves. “Ah.”
“I shouldn’t, though.”
“But?” I ask, because as hard as it is for me to read people, I can tell when someone has more to say.
“I’ve just never been able to resist him.”
“So, you fuck, and you have feelings, but you can’t tell him that.”
Isaac exhales heavily. “Feelings aren’t what he wants from me.”
