“Um…”
“My female is both territorial and overprotective of me, brethren!Have I not been blessed by the Gods today, twice even?”
A chorus of wing flapping.
I tucked my hand against my chest.I wouldn’t be surprised ifhe tried to lick the crumbs of cake off my fingers, one by one.He had already misinterpreted enough of my gestures as it was, believing I was signaling interest.
I wasnotinterested.I did not want to snuggle in his lap and let his body heat seep into me.I did not crave more of his scorching kisses and arousing touches.His manhandling tendencies got my heart racing with indignation, nothing else.I wanted to get to know him better, but only so I could get back home and not empty-handed.No other reason.
I hid a contented smile behind my second dessert when Xaniban began eating.He deftly used his claws to help himself to cured meat and cheese.
I wished there was more cake for him, but I had inhaled the last piece.And I was pretty sure the others had left it for me on purpose.Thoughtful gargoyles.
No longer distracted by the food with my belly full, I studied the paintings in the war room to learn more about my hosts.
The one to my left depicted gargoyles descending from the darkening sky with their swords drown.Underneath was a small army of cloaked figures marching along a meadow.The hoods of everyone but the mounted leader’s were pulled down, leaving their faces in shadow.The horse rider had his hood drawn to reveal overly pale skin, reddish eyes, and two rows of pointed teeth bared at the incoming enemy.
I did a double take.“Is that Dracula?”I blurted out.
The vividly painted face of the vampire bore an uncanny resemblance to the portrait of Vlad Tepes I used to have on a fridge magnet.It was a souvenir from a trip to Romania years ago, so I’d spent a lot of time rummaging through my fridge under the piercing gaze of the Impaler.
“Do not worry.”Xaniban patted my thigh.“He is no longer among the living.My uncle took his head years ago, putting an end to the spread of his blood curse beyond the monsters he had alreadycreated.Whoever leads the remaining cursed is not as cunning.”
“So vamps existed as far back as the 15th century?I knew it!You Gargoyles existed at the time, too, didn’t you?”Then the meaning of his last words sunk in.“Wait, you mean Dracula was alive until years ago?”
My hypothesis was correct, then!The creatures behind the second apocalypse had been here for a long time.They just knew how to hide from humans very well.
When I took in the painting to my right, I realized the same applied to the monsters who had caused the first apocalypse.
Because what the gargoyles were fighting in this work of art was a group of Black Death victims.They were rising from a pile of corpses against the backdrop of a freshly built Notre-Dame de Paris.And leading this small army of the dead was a rider whose plague doctor’s mask was lifted to reveal a familiar face.
Ignore the long hair and bushy beard, and you had Agent 007.
– 9 –
Zombie 007
The talented actor who played Bond in five movies–alive centuries ago and leading an army of zombies.Insanity.But there was no mistaking that unwavering expression.Especially once you’d seen it from up close while trying to get away from a corporate party gone terribly wrong.
There went my concern that I might have bluffed my way into the war room.My suspicion about the zombie king’s identity had just been confirmed.
“He isn’t dead.Not permanently,” I told the gargoyles.“At least, he wasn’t six months ago.”
“Speak freely.Let us hear what you know, and then my brethren and I will talk in private.”Xaniban sounded serious.Dinner and teasing time was over.
“I’ll tell you all I know, but I want answers, too.”I gave him a firm look.He wouldnotbe sidelining me.
Xaniban looked at his warriors, who responded with a flap of wings.Only then did the king nod at me.
I got up, and he let me step away.I suddenly felt uneasy without his tail around my waist and his solid presence at my back, but I quickly pushed the strange feeling down.I had to focus.
I stopped next to the Zombie 007 vs.Gargoyles painting and faced the room.I could do this.It was simply a regular presentation to my bosses, not a report in front of a supernatural war council.Mhm, nothing out of the ordinary here.
“I met him half a year ago.”I put a finger next to the face of the actor I used to have a crush on in university.“He’s a famous person in this century, and as such was invited to attend this special party at my workplace–today’s battlefield, as you call it.My bosses had pulled some strings and filled some wallets and, voilà, he would be the face of our new product.An anti-wrinkle cream based on cutting-edge technology in cosmetics.My team believed it would revolutionize the industry.”
Yeah, more like obliterate it along with the world.
I stopped for a breather, half expecting the usual questions I’d gotten from friends.“How is this cream any different from all the other useless goo companies are trying to sell us?”, “How do they expect us to believe such creams work, when the actresses advertising them are too young to have wrinkles in the first place?”, and “Will the frequent use of your cream make my face as rock-solid as the villain’s in thatCatwomanmovie?”
