Surprise flickers in his gaze, and I squeeze his hand once before letting go. “Goodnight. I’ll see you in the morning.”
His jaw tightens, like there’s more he wants to say, but all that comes out is a quiet, “Good night.”
I walk to my room, leaving the board game on the floor and Sterling standing in the living room as he watches me go.
Behind the safety of my door, my back hits the wood and I press my palms to my face, willing my breath to even out. Because the awful, brutal truth is that I want him. I want Sterling like a starving person wants food, like no time has passed, like I didn’t ruin everything we were.
And that’s the part that guts me. How can I even want him, when I’m the reason he left in the first place? When I’m the one who broke us, who pushed him away, who couldn’t stand to let him see me shattered and weak?
I thought I was protecting him. Instead, I destroyed him.
And now he’s here again.
And wanting him feels like reaching for something I already lost.
Something I don’t deserve.
EIGHTEEN
MAISY
Sterling pullsmy truck into the parking lot of the outdoor skating rink in town. I stay quiet as I stare out the window at the strings of lights twinkling above the ice and the couples gliding hand in hand, cheeks pink, and scarves fluttering while they laugh.
It’sCouples Night, and the irony of being here with Sterling isn’t lost on me.
We haven’t talked about what happened between us the other night during the blackout, but it’s been replaying in my mind like a broken record. The feel of his mouth, his hands, the need that nearly consumed me whole. It’s becoming painfully unbearable just being around him after that.
“Remind me again why we agreed to this?” I mutter as I watch a couple on the ice spin in each other’s arms like they’re rehearsing a figure skating routine.
“Because your brother asked us to wingman for him tonight,” Sterling replies calmly, watching the same couple.
Levi called bright and early yesterday morning to check if Sterling and I had survived the blackout, and before hanging up,he casually begged us to team up and wingman him on a date with—as he put it—”the hottest girl on the planet.”
I blow out a frustrated breath. “Of all the places Levi could’ve picked for a fake double date, he had to pick the rink?” I push the door open, my boots sinking into the snow as I hop out.
Sterling rounds the car, meeting me at the back with a lazy grin. “Remind me again why you hate skating?”
I shake my head quickly. “The idea of falling flat on rock hard ice sounds like a terrible plan. Especially after the accident.”
“Don’t worry,” he says, taking my hand in his as we start walking to the skate rental booth. “I’ll make sure you don’t fall.”
I look down at our joined hands, basking in the warmth, and then back up at him. “What are you doing?”
“Pretty sure this is called holding hands, Maisy,” he deadpans.
“I can see that,” I shoot back. “But why?”
He lifts my hand to his mouth and presses a slow kiss to the back of it, causing my entire body to burn up, like there’s a fire racing under my skin.
“Because we’re supposed to be pretending that we’re here for a double date with your brother and some girl,” he says, that smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth like he knows exactly what he’s doing to me.
“Okay,” I breathe, trying not to let my knees buckle. “But shouldn’t you save that for when they’re actually watching?”
He stops us in the middle of the lot, his hand leaving mine and sliding up the side of my neck, pulling me closer until his forehead rests against mine. His breath ghosts over my lips, not quite a kiss, but so damn close my body screams for it.
“Your heart’s beating so fast,” he whispers, eyes closed, a smile grazing his lips as his thumb gently strokes the side of my neck where my pulse is pounding.
Heat flares up my neck, blooming into my cheeks, and words clog my throat.
