Alice steps in stride beside me. “It’s much safer than it was when I first arrived. The Krijese would attack, and we lost a lot of people from those first two ships. We’re lucky the Tavikhi were here, and that most of the Krijese tribe ended up being killed in some battle after their king raided the Tavikhi village.” She slowly shakes her head. “There were some dark times in the early days. Thankfully, Kala and the remaining Krijese don’t bother us.”
I’ve heard stories of the vicious alien species that reside up in the hills beyond the Tavikhi village. After overhearing someone describe the Krijese, I’m glad to have never run across one. Although, if people are to be believed, a human from the same ship I’d traveled on is now mated to the Krijese leader.
“That’s good.”
We walk a bit farther before Alice slows. “This is where I take my leave. Always a pleasure, Piper.”
She waves and then heads off to wherever it is she needs to go. While Gary and Adam are the self-proclaimed leaders of the community, Alice is the one who does the actual work. She makes the rounds and ensures every person is doing their share to help the settlement run smoothly since everything is on a barter system. She makes sure families have food and any other essentials. Apparently everyone’s forgotten that humanity goes to shit when men are in charge. By the time they smarten up and elect a woman, they expect her to be a miracle worker and fixeverything. Of course, when she doesn’t meet their expectations, the people elect a man again and the shit gets worse.
“I’d really hoped it would be different here.”
Several people stare at me funny.
“What? You don’t ever talk to yourself?”
They all quickly glance away. I sigh in a combination of annoyance and loneliness and continue toward my tent on the far side of the settlement.
I duck inside, but tie back the door flap to let some air in, as well as what remains of the sun. Not that there aren’t still plenty of hours left before the sun disappears completely. The days on Tavikh are long. Far longer than they are on Earth, which has taken some getting used to.
Lying beside my pillow is the data pad I have to return to the community building tomorrow. Alice created a check-out system for them, so that anyone could borrow one for two days at a time, similar to the way libraries used to work. Since there isn’t anything else for me to do, I power it up and go back to watching this video tutorial on pottery making. The ground here is clay-like and I suspect would be perfect for making things.
When I next glance up, the sun has finally descended and, in its place, is the first of the two moons. I’m not ready for bed yet, but I power down the device anyway and head for the side entrance of the settlement with my bar of soap to wash up a little.
With a clean face and clean arms, I make my way back to my tent and change into my night clothes. Maybe tonight, the anxiety will be at a minimum. After all, today was a pretty decent dayoverall. I managed to walk a fair distance without getting tired. I’m counting that as a win.
I lie on my pallet and stare up at the curved “ceiling”. Too bad I can’t see the stars. Instead, I conjure up the image of the Tavikhi scout I met while out in the forest. Katem. A strong, alien name for a strong, alien male. His arms bulged in all the right places and the veins of his forearms were just visible. He had really nice hands, too. I’ve never figured out why I find certain hands sexy. I’m not sure if it’s their shape or their sculpted lines or what. Not all hands are sexy, either. Just some of them.
Katem’s included. I squirm a little imagining the Tavikhi touching me with those hands. His long, thick fingers caressing all the parts of my body.
Unbidden, I slide my own hand under the elastic waistband of my pants and farther down, beneath my panties until I reach my damp, slick center. My clit throbs with need. I dip my fingertip into my wetness and then return it to the sensitive nub, rubbing it the way I love. My body twitches and jerks as the tension swells inside me.
Katem’s feline-like yellow and dark purple eyes come to mind, along with his full lips, and the golden hair that flowed down his back and along the length of his shoulders. He was beautiful, but in a masculine way. My fingers speed up as I picture the way his muscles rippled and flexed when he walked beside me. And his scent. God, Katem smelled so good. Like the entire forest all rolled into one, but I could also pick out each note. Like the blue flowers of the giant bush and the eucalyptus-like fragrance I’ve caught from one of the plants. I even think there was a hint of chocolate. He should have smelled bad, all the different odors mixing with each other, and yet, they blended together perfectly.
I switch directions and speed of my fingers working at my clit and the tension builds, growing more taut. I chase the sensation, my breaths coming faster. Sweat dampens my forehead. My toes curl. My back arches, until my release hits, spasms wrack my body, and pleasure makes my clit tingle. I soar through the air and colors spark behind my closed eyelids. Slowly, the intense feelings subside and leave behind a simmering satisfaction. On its heels, though, is a growing ache of loneliness. Of heartache. Of despair. Tears burn my eyes, and I try to blink them away, but I can’t stop them from overflowing and spilling down my temples, wetting my hair in their wake. My life wasn’t supposed to be like this. End like this.
“It’s not fair.” But no matter how many times I curse God or the universe or whatever higher power might exist, nothing changes.
I withdraw my hand from beneath my pants and roll onto my side. Tears continue to flow over the bridge of my nose and down my temple to soak the pillow beneath my head. Tonight—like nearly every night—I’ll mourn, but come tomorrow I’m going to explore and live and make all the memories I can, while I can.
My head aches and I’m all congested, but I force my eyes open anyway. The heat of the day has already made the interior of my tent stuffy. I roll out of my pallet and gather up the few toiletries I have, as well as a towel and a change of clothes, and wind my way through the settlement.
I spot a few people down at the river but head farther downstream to a small inlet I found on one of my ventures. It’s hidden by the sagging branches of a massive tree with a trunk that has to be the width of at least five human adults.
Because it doesn’t see much sun, the water is several degrees colder than the rest of the river, but I don’t mind. It’s better than having to wash up with only a small kettle of water like I did back on Earth.
I dip my toes in and shudder, but still shed my clothes and quickly walk a short distance in before I have a chance to change my mind. I sit in the shallow water and wash myself from head to toe, leaning backward a couple extra times to ensure all the shampoo is rinsed out of my hair, which isn’t that easy in a seated position. Goosebumps form down my arms and my nipples are hard pebbles that ache from the cold.
After I’m as clean as I’m going to get, I towel off and, while still damp, get dressed. I gather up all my things and take them back to my tent. Tomorrow, I’ll do laundry. Or maybe the day after. It depends on how long I decide to procrastinate. Why spend what little time I have left doing things I hate?
Over the last year, I’ve made a mental list of things I want to experience. I’m not sure how I’ll accomplish it all or if the tasks are even possible, but I’m going to do whatever I can.
Except I’m coming to realize I don’t want to do any of it alone.
My thoughts drift to Katem. He was adamant that I not wander around by myself. Would he be amenable to helping me tick things off my list? Sure, he’s basically a stranger, but he’d been so kind yesterday. He’s also pretty to look at and it certainly wouldn’t be a hardship to be in his company.
Since I’m determined to be brave about everything from now on, I guess that means asking him. The worst he can do is say no, right? With a determined stride, I exit through the front gates and across the long length of the yellow field of grass thatresembles cotton balls on kebob sticks. It’s almost knee-high by this point in the season, but soon it will be flattened by the buckets of snow that’ll fall and fall and fall for several months without stop.
At first, it had been pretty, but after the first month or so I’d grown sick of looking at it. I shudder to think what this winter will bring.
