A sliver of panic slips in. I’ve left myself unguarded. Undefended.
Stupid—
But I’m there. So close, that all I have to do is push a little more—
For a moment, everything vanishes. The feel of the damp, stone floor. The harsh noise of my breath in the cold air. And the pain, that goes too.
I lose all sense of myself in entering Lyra’s mind.
And the moment I do—the moment I open that eye, buried inside my own mind, and see what Lyra sees—I realize that I’ve made a mistake far greater than any my father warned me about.
My mind scrabbles for the rope, to pull myself free.Take me back, take me—
Gone. The rope is gone. Frayed and scattered beneath the weight of my panic as I try to yank myself free.
Somewhere, in another place, I begin to scream. To claw at the ground, to beg for help that isn’t coming.
Because nobody knows that I’m here.
Kaelen
“Stop pacing.”
Something small and hard bounces off my chest. Twisting, I frown at Eres. He shrugs unrepentantly and tosses another sugar cluster at me. This one hits me in the forehead, dropping down to land on the crumpled parchment in my hands. “He’s coming.”
“I don’t care if he comes or not.” I glare at the door. “I’m not waiting for him.”
I need some damned sleep. Between our dwindling food stores, lack of resources, lack ofeverything, I feel as though I’m drowning. “Whatever he wants to discuss can’t be that important.”
Another crystal hits me. I stride over and snatch the bowl from Eres’s hands, setting it down on the table beside the bed. “You’regoing to regret that when you run out. There isn’t anyone left to prune another batch.”
“And you’re telling me thisnow?” When I don’t respond, Eres sighs. He stretches out on the bed. “You need to get past this with Darian, Kae. Before it’s too late to change things.”
That doesn’t help. If anything, it threatens to crack open the panic I’m trying my fucking best to keep contained. I blurt the words out. “They’re moving into the Veilspire.”
It takes Eres a moment to follow my trail of thought. He moves faster than I do. I’ve been trying to focus all day, ever since the on-duty sentry found me this morning to pass along the scribbled message from one of the scouts. Eres sits up immediately, gesturing for the message. “Why haven’t you called a Council meeting?”
“Another fucking meeting.” I hand it to him, and turn, resuming pacing while trying not to stare at the door. “All we have are meetings, Eres. Hour after hour of sitting around that table, saying the same thing without any of us acknowledging the truth.”
And I couldn’t face it. “This is the end. There’s nothing left. We can’t hold them off.”
After close to two hundred years of fighting, the Lightbringers have finally succeeded in their mission to eradicate the Darkwielders from existence. All they need to do is pick us off. “I’m ordering the evac tomorrow. Anyone who wants to leave can. The rest will hold the line for as long as we can.”
“Kaelen.” Eres is pale, his brow knotted as he scans the message. Turning it over, as if it might reveal some secret that will save us. “You can’t. Not yet. Just… just wait a little longer.”
My laughter is short, sharp,broken. I can’t remember the last time I smiled with anything resembling true happiness. “If I wait any longer, there’s no chance at all. We have days, weeksat most, before Vaelion launches a full assault. They need to be away before then if they’re going to have even a chance—”
“There is no chance,” Eres breathes. “You know it, and I know it. They can’t survive out there.”
“Then they die here!”
Fuck. The pain in my chest expands with my roar, a deep, swelling agony. My knees hit the ground, my palms following.
I can’t breathe. Can’t take any air in, only a wheezing sound making its way out.
“Kaelen.” Eres is at my side. “Kaelen!”
Help me.
