Sighing, I wrap my hands around his, keeping them where they are, soaking in the warmth of his palms. “I just… I don’t see how she can forgive me, Lo.”
It keeps playing on my mind. Every harsh word, every snap, every fucking bad decision I’ve made. Lo is a far, far better alpha than I am, because I don’t think I could ever forgive myself for the shit I pulled on him over the last four years.
And my Soul Bonded? My fucking fatedmate? I wouldn’t blame her if she never let me near her again.
Logan shakes his head. “That’s the thing, Gray. I’m not asking her for forgiveness. I’m just going to love her. The way she needs to be loved. And of course, I hope she forgives me. But I’ll wait as long as it takes. Will you?”
“Of course I will.”
It’s the least I can do. Logan leans in, brushing a kiss across my lips. “Then show her that. She doesn’t know you, Gray. All she knows is the harsh alpha face you put on. I know therealyou. Ilovethe real you. And she will, too. But you have to show her.”
I close my eyes, breathing him in. “I love you too, you know.”
“I know.” His words are affectionate. “Even when your head is up your ass.”
He looks down at my little project. “I haven’t seen you whittle for years.”
“I thought I might’ve forgotten how,” I admit, holding it up to the light. “I can’t exactly design her a building, but I thought she might like these.”
It helps to keep my hands busy while I drive myself insane thinking of all the ways I’ve fucked up. I keep seeing Sienna’s face, over and over again. The Bonding Ceremony. That tortuous, blissful moment in the shitty excuse for a nest we gave her, before I took what little trust she had in me and snapped it under my shoe.
If regret was money, I’d be a fucking billionaire by now.
“You should talk to Emmett,” Logan says, tilting his head. “Get some feedback on your ideas for the beta housing in Navarre.”
My jaw clenches. “None of that matters now.”
The only thing that matters to me now is my pack. Sienna. Logan. Jax and Tristan.
I’ll never lose sight of that again.
I spend the rest of my day in the forest, messing around with pieces of wood and grabbing a sandwich from Logan before I head into the bar. I sniff cautiously at my shirt as I walk up to Emmett.
He grimaces when he sees me, and I look down. “It’s bad, right?”
There’s no shower out there, just an outhouse with a tiny sink. My heart sinks when he nods. I don’t want Sienna to smell me before she can see me, but I don’t have much of a choice.
“It’s… pretty bad. You’ll have to use the shower tomorrow. You’ll drive my customers away.”
I glance around the empty bar. “Yeah.”
He motions towards the stairs. “Go on up. Her door’s on the right.”
With a nod, I make my way slowly up the small wooden staircase. Creaking noises announce my imminent arrival, and Jessalyn pokes her head out of a doorway.
“Asshole number three!” she calls. “Myleastfavorite one.”
She doesn’t miss my flinch, her eyes narrowing as they take me in. “Is Sienna here?”
“Yeah,” she says dubiously. “But – dude. Seriously?”
“There’s no shower,” I say defensively. “I can wash up in the bathroom.”
“There’s no shower?” A small voice interrupts my stare-off with the she-devil, and I twist to face Sienna. Scanning her, I try not to let the relief show on my face that she looks a little healthier than the last time I saw her.
She shifts on bare feet, and I belatedly realize that I’m staring her down like I’m about to take a bite out of her.
Switching my gaze hastily to my feet, I shuffle uncomfortably. “I – ah – we were just—,”
