“You shouldn’t have to worry about where you’re going to sleep night to night. Being on the streets isn’t safe. It isn’t ideal,” I tell her.
“But if I’m with you, then what’s the difference? Besides, I can get a job and help out,” she says as I squeeze her closer.
“I know we don’t talk about your life much, and that’s fine, but I have to say it. After what you’re used to, why would you want this?” She doesn’t speak at first, but then I hear her sigh.
“My life wasn’t great. Was it better than sleeping on the streets? Yeah, it was to a point. I had a bed, a home, but it wasn’t really my place. All they wanted from me was money and power. When I think back on how things were when I was younger, I can’t see the love that a child is supposed to have. There was always something more, a glint in their eyes.”
“I’m not one to judge, given my situation, but you seem to have it all there. Take the money and run, River.”
“The money isn’t what’s important to me. I didn’t want to be married to someone who looked at me as a dollar sign and not a person.”
“Fair enough.” The rest of the ride, we just sit in silence. She stays tucked into my side, and I just take it all in.
When we get off, we find Jeremy in a panic.
“What’s wrong?” I ask when I see his face.
“Her dad’s here,” he blurts out.
“What?” We both say at the same time.
“He’s here. Grand opening shit,” Jeremy says in a hurry.
“Fuck. Let’s go,” I tell her. River wraps her arm around my waist, and I keep her as tightly as possible against my side as we head for the entrance.
“Keep your head down,” I tell her. She nods and does what she’s told, lowering her head so no one can look her in the eye.
We make it out of the fair and down the block before she breathes a sigh of relief.
“Sorry, wish that was longer,” I tell her.
“It’s okay. I had fun,” she beams up at me.
“You did?”
“Yeah. I always have fun with you, Royal.” Something about her words sends a warm feeling through my chest that I can’t seem to get enough of, and I don’t know if I want to.
River is becoming something I want to keep around. Something I want more of, and in the end, I think that’s going to be bad for both of us. My life isn’t changing direction from the path it’s on, and I know there’s so much more out there for her.
Chapter 20
River
The weeks have gone by in a blur. More fights, more nights in the warehouse. I have a feeling in the pit of my stomach that I should be doing more, even though Royal said no. I told him I would get a job and help out with money, and he said fuck that, he didn’t need help. I just wanted to make things easier on everyone.
I know that Jeremy gets a cut of what Royal makes for setting up the fights, but that also goes back into where we stay and how we eat. Some nights, I regret staying just because I know how hard it is for him to make the money he does, and knowing about his sister makes it worse.
“Will you ever visit her?” I ask as we lie on the roof of the old warehouse and look up at the stars.
“One day.”
“Have you since you left?”
“No. I don’t want her to get her hopes up or expect anything. I can’t take her with me,” he says in nearly a whisper.
“If you could? Would you?”
“Not to live like this. At least there she has a bed, a roof over her head.”
