This is insane.
It was, and it wasn’t. As I bit my lip and cried tears of joy it occurred to me that maybe I was made for this. Maybe they were too. They took me as one, and that little detail turned me on like crazy. The way they moved, the way they handled my body; it was all so synchronized, so coordinated, so utterly perfect.
Rolling my head dreamily back and forth, I imagined a life like this. Waking up with one, two, or three of them in my bed. Letting them share me as much as they wanted, as often as possible. I’d be living a dream. Floating on cloud nine, througha love life that very few women could possibly imagine. Each night I’d go to bed having to satisfy not one but three incredible, insatiable men. And every time I’d feel a pair of hot lips close over my nipple, and my legs nudged apart in the dead of night? I could leave my sleepy eyes closed, and not really be sure of who was even fucking me.
They came at the same time, which was a pretty neat trick. I felt Sawyer stiffen all over, his hand holding the back of my head pinned against his abdomen as he shot his hot, thick load down my willing throat. His spasms hadn’t even subsided when I felt Bodie’s fingers claw even tighter against the tender flesh of my ass. A moment later he was coming too; his long, rock-hard shaft pulsing wildly inside me, thumping rhythmically against my womb.
I fell asleep between their two hard bodies, feeling safer and more loved than ever before. I was ensconced by warmth and flesh; still reeling from the orgasm-induced dopamine, swimming through my brain. I waswiththem now, consequences be damned. Back here, where I belonged, for as long as they’d have me.
And how long is that, Hayden?
Drowsily, I found that I didn’t care. I’d completely given myself over to these men. Entrusted the three of them with every aspect of my happiness and well-being, knowing full well that at any time, my heart could be crushed.
Yet if I didn’t open my heart, I’d never find out. I’d miss out on the pure joy of committing to something so beyond the scope of incredible, I was willing to risk everything to have it — even if fleetingly. Cole was a hundred miles away now, and getting further with every minute. I had Sawyer, and Bodie, and Carter, who’d be arriving tomorrow. I’d throw myself into thoseiron arms and kiss him until he couldn’t stand anymore, then crash to the nearest bed to kiss him some more.
Somehow, everything had changed. In just a few short hours I’d gone from rock bottom to everything being right in my world again.
And that’s when I knew: I was well and trulyhome.
~ 46 ~
HAYDEN
The place was a greasy spoon by all accounts, but the food was so good it didn’t matter. The eggs were fluffy, the toast crispy, the bacon had just the right amount of chew. But it was the coffee that unlocked all new levels of consciousness for me. It was so rich and delicious, my eyes began hunting down our waiter for my fourth cup.
Sawyer sat across from me, leaning back on his haunches. All morning long, he had the smile of the cat who ate the canary. He evendideat the canary; on his knees in the shower, right before we came here.
“What are you thinking right now?”
The question took me by surprise. I shrugged.
“Nothing, really.”
“It has to be something,” Sawyer countered. “Nobody thinks of nothing. Unless you’re meditating. In which case you’retryingto think about nothing, but even that’s thinking about—”
“Alright, fine,” I chuckled. “I was thinking about Cole.”
Sawyer’s brows came together. “Cole?”
“Hey, you wanted to know.”
I studied his face, partly for a reaction, but mostly because he was so fucking hot. Sawyer’s sandy blond hair was still wet from the shower. And almost by magic, the motorcycle helmets we’d worn on the way here had tousled it just the right way.
The waiter interrupted us briefly by pouring two new coffees. I added some cream to each, and began stirring them.
“I was thinking he’s probably turned around by now, no?”
“Maybe,” Sawyer allowed. “Does it matter?”
“No,” I answered quickly. “I mean, I guess I’m a little afraid of how he’s going to handle this. You just got the bar back. I don’t want him to ruin that for you.”
Sawyer’s mouth twisted into a ‘who gives a fuck’ smirk. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. As he did, a lock of errant hair slid in front of one eye.
“Sir Smash-a-Lot isn’t ruining anything for anyone,” he said evenly. “Not anymore. Carter, Bodie, and I will make sure of that.”
This time I remained silent. Like Fox Mulder, I wanted to believe.
“If he comes to The Refuge again, we’re going to deal with him,” he said, his expression going uncharacteristically dark. “And if he comes for you?” He paused, sipped his coffee, and shook his head. “We’re going toendhim.”
