Chapter 11
Friday couldn’t getto here as fast as it did, even with seeing Max every single day during the week. We finished our proposal, but it was hard to concentrate sometimes with him sending me secret notes and shooting smiles across the table. I was surprised that Chase hadn’t left the room on multiple occasions. But even though Max had tried to make it as lighthearted as possible during the week, I was still nervous abouttonight.
Lilly lay with me on the couch, patiently waiting for Max to text me. He was going to let me know when to start getting ready and what to wear. I was nervous because he had clearly been planning this out, and I just didn’t know how to take that. Adam had never put this much thought into a date, not even for our anniversaries. I was always the one planning, but it felt nice to be taken care of foronce.
Lilly’s phone buzzed, and she shotup.
“Go get dressed now.” It wasn’t a sweet demand either. The look on her face sent me running to my room. She screamed after me. “Something withfloral!”
I rummaged through my closet but found nothing. Floral was not my thing. Girly was not my thing. I was pulling out a pair of pants when a knock came from the frontdoor.
“It’s Max.” I heard Max’s voice from my room. I didn’t want to answer it, so I made sure to close my bedroom door. Lilly had just told me to get dressed, and now he was here. Was he here to time me, see how long it took to getready?
I heard Lilly answer and let Max in, but I could barely hear their conversation over the sporadic heartbeat in my ears. They talked a little more before I heard a soft knock on mydoor.
“It’s just me, Alexa. Open up.” I opened the door to Lilly, who was blocking my view out into the living room. She handed me a note. I was sure I had a crazed look on my face by the way she laughed atme.
“Just so you know.” Lilly leaned in closer to me. The whisper of her words made it so only I could hear. “I’m pretty sure this is going to be your fairy-taledate.”
I brought the note to my heart and shut the door quickly. I leaned against it so no one else could comein.
My heart skipped a beat when I opened thenote:
Wear whatever makes you feelcomfortable.
Lilly was right. I had never been told to wear what makes me feel comfortable on a date, but it was like Max knew I would stress about this. It was like he knew me. I held the note against my chest, right above my heart, where it belonged. This man scared me, but in the best way possible. I went to my closet and pulled out a few dresses, forgetting the pants idea. I tossed a few onto the bed but couldn’t decide on one that wasme.
When I looked back at the clock, I realized that half an hour had already passed and I wasn’t dressed yet. I was getting impatient with myself. I went to the door when I heard Lilly calling myname.
“What?” I whispered so I didn’t have to open up. I didn’t want Max to see how disheveled I was. He may have said to wear whatever I wanted to, but that didn’t mean there weren’t expectations among men. I needed to look a certain way, dress a certain way, act a certainway.
“Let me in to help.” She knew me too well. I opened up the door ever so slightly to just see Lilly, but Max was standing in the middle of the living room and I got a full view. He was in jeans with a dress shirt tucked in and the sleeves rolled up. He lookedperfect.
“Ugh, how am I supposed to dress next to that?!” I slammed the door closed in Lilly’s face and headed towards the bathroom. My bedroom door didn’t lock, but the bathroom one did. I heard the door to my room open soon after I leaned up against the bathroomdoor.
“Open up, Alexa.” Max’s voice made me shiver. His voice was soft, not like I was expecting. “Let mein.”
“I don’t think I can do this, Max.” I just didn’t know how a man like him could choose a girl like me. I was nothing compared to him. Girls would flock to him, and the only man to ever come after me, I married. I just didn’t know how to do this. “Just gohome.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” Vibrations went through my back as his fist pounded against the door. I stood there in silence. This whole thing was going wrong, and the more I thought about not just the outfit, but everything, the more anxious I got. I hadn’t gone on a first date in six years. What were you supposed to do nowadays? “What’s wrong,Alexa?”
“Everything.”
“Talk to me.” He tried jiggling the handle. “What do youneed?”
He was asking me what I needed. I looked up at the ceiling, thinking about Adam. All he had ever wanted was for me to cater to his needs, but the man standing on the other side of this door was asking me aboutmyneeds. I felt a lone tear move down mycheek.
“I don’t need anything, Max.” It was true. I didn’t need anything. “I just don’t know how to dothis.”
“Dowhat?”
“Date.” I expected him to say something, but no. Where would Max even take me on a date to? A fancy restaurant or a museum? Those would be good for him, but I don’t know about me though. I was a pizza and a movie type of girl. I’d even love to go to a bookstore. All things that Adam never wanted to do. On our date nights we stayed at home, binge-watched his favorite TV shows, I cooked him dinner, and then we went to bed. Even when we went out, he got to choose where we went, what movie we saw. I truly hadn’t had any say in anything when it came toAdam.
“I’m going to give you ten minutes to finish getting dressed, and then I’m coming back in here and helping you.” I pounded my head against the door, sending back the vibration that he had done earlier. Why couldn’t he just leave? “And you’re not the only one who’s scared abouttonight.”
Max, scared? I didn’t believe it, but I heard him sigh and jiggle the handle one more time before he exited myroom.
I stayed in the bathroom for what only felt like a few more minutes before going back out to my room. Why would Max be scared about tonight? Wasn’t he the type of man that could always get the girl? Was this supposed to be some big date for him? If it was, that just made me more nervous. The questions just kept racking through my brain while I took another look into my closet. I tried on a few dresses, hating them both. I figured I had a few more minutes before his ten minutes were up, but as I was about to put on another dress, an arm came around mystomach.
